People who emerge from regimental lifestyle, years of living in close proximity with others whom you have to rely on, once out on your own you start building mind blocks around oneself for protection.

Whether we realize this or not many do build "walls of protection" for themselves. You are extremely fortunate having a father to turn to, assisting you to unburden yourself in realization it has been developing in your mind for quite sometime.

Wishing you a wonderful new week, hopefully this content reaches others seeking advice from similar years experiencing this hardship @jaichai