Reading Dostoevsky’s Notes from Underground sparked a massive realization about my own brain.🤭
Back in high school, I was the literal definition of the Underground Man: I’d sit through an exam and intentionally refuse to write a single answer, destroying my own grades just to prove a point that I could sink lower.
It was pure, spiteful self-sabotage to prove I was in control.😅
Fast forward to now, dealing with mental burnout looks different. I still find myself indulging in mindless entertainment that doesn't meet my standards, but the contrast is huge: I’m not trying to crash the ship anymore. My instinct now is to stop the damage right away. Turns out, navigating a hyper-aware brain is a glitch as old as 19th-century Russian literature.🥴