Oh @marlyncabrera, you have so much wisdom, my dear! Yes, those repeat behaviors and choices — oh my! We find those narcissists because they are comfortably familiar. I can absolutely relate to how you described that. My mother (may she rest in peace) was a wonderful but powerful person who had a grip on me that was very hard to extract myself from. And so what did I do? I ran away... and into the arms of someone who had the same traits! Like you, I very happily made a different and better choice, once I recognized the pattern and found a way to believe in and stand up for myself. It is a journey.