I've read an article some time ago about child raising, about spanking, the effect. It made me think, it made me ponder.
I am interested in this subject for several reasons.
- I love children, they are so interesting and cute and funny.
- They become adults that I will have to deal with.
- The world will change for the better or for the worst by them.
If you want to hit your child, stop, think, remember, you are hitting the world. Every hit you give to him/her will be like a boomerang. You will have your obedience in the moment but wait until they grow up.
You must first understand what Beating, Spanking, Yelling, Emotional manipulation are. They are tools for Torture, in different degrees of severity. You may say, wait torture, come on, COME ON! Torture is when you inflict sever pain to make a man comply. Look it up in the dictionary, Torture Definition .
You will think, well, what a shitty article, I am even more convinced now that beating the kids it's the best way of educating them. Backfire Effect
So you decide to use pain as your tool for raising your children. That means implicitly that you think, hitting the child will make him behave better, develop better, make him a better, kinder human. If you didn't believe this, you wouldn't hit him right? Unless you are a psychopath. OK, so that means the more you hit him, the better he will grow up. This type of reasoning just escalates violence. Do you really want to look into your child's eyes and see fear instead of love? Do you want to hate yourself deep down inside, because you know this is wrong, no one uses spanking at the office to make you perform better at your job, no one beats a senile old man for not using the potty.
If you could raise the children in a nonviolent manner don't you think you would be happier, and they would too?
Children that come to visit you in your old age, because they love you, not because they feel obligated.
Well the science is in, since 50 years ago... Well, in the age of information, parenthood changes slowly. This is because people had such bad childhoods they don't want to study nothing connected to that, to that feeling of powerlessness and violence and fear, all with nice words like I love you and I want what's best for you. This reminds me about the Stockholm syndrome .
To be a Peaceful Parent you must first understand that your parents did things wrong, and to many I understand causes them to reject the idea. It has severe implications if you say "My parents spanked me and it was wrong and damaging for me". Well that implies that you are less of a person you could have been, a much lesser version. If you have a scale from -10 to +10, tortured to absolute reasoning, well you see that the disadvantage that was created for you was even greater than that o child that was not hit or reasoned with, just grew around his parents. That is why so many people decide to hit their children, because they can't accept their parents mistakes. If you look closely tho, you almost always see that every generation hits their children less. Why is that? They know that violence is bad, that little shred of empathy, makes them less violent towards their children and so on and so on. I ask, why wait 10 generations of natural improvement in parenting, when we could have it in one, this one!
Don't you want to live in a world that would only become reality 500 years from now, at the end of your life?
If you reason with your kids and not abuse them, they will make you the biggest gift imaginable. They will give you the privilege to see into the future!
If you decline their offer, and insist on harming them, the risk of war and destruction will never stop.
I will put a list of negative effects from spanking and other violent ways of treating children. This is for the fact people.
Also you can read the study in its entirety, Children Should Never, Ever, Be Spanked No Matter What the Circumstances
Negative effects (found in 110 out of 117 separate research studies, that is 94%)
- Increased aggression
- Antisocial behavior
- Low empathy
- Depression
some studies controlled for warmth and found the same damage when loving parents spanked - Slow rate of cognitive development
- Lower scores
- Higher crime risk
Beneficial effects
- Short term compliance
You know what to do, do the right thing. You are good people, treat your children with respect and you will make this world a paradise! Good luck!
One of my sketches.