The humans mocked another human calling them a hippo.
The human, much to the shock of their Alliance friends, thanked the mockers.
The mockers were shocked and swore at the human.
The human said "You just compared me to one of THE most feared animals on the planet next to the humble mosquito. An animal that is fast, powerful, literally a living, amphibious, tank. So thanks!" -- Fighting Fit
Of all the things that could happen in the Edge Territories, this was one of the least damaging. Well. One that was the least physically damaging. Human Fye grinned menacingly at her insulters and said, "Thanks for recognising me as dangerous to your continued health."
Those who insulted her scurried into the shadows.
Fye grinned at her Havenworlder client. "Fun fact. Hippos kill more Terrans than sharks. Yet it's the sharks people fear more than the hippopotamus. Weird how we suck at threat assessment." She paused to consider this. "Then again, hippos look cute, blobby, and friend-shaped until they open their mouths. Sharks have all the sharp all over them."
Havenworlder Poun boggled at hir Deathworlder guardian. "I had read in some archival material that sharks are smooth[1]."
Fye laughed. "Oh yes. Ancient memetic humour that got mined for training data for generative algorithms. It got into historical knowledge at one point. It's still haunting the facts about Earth to this day. Those jippities wrecked lots of things for loads of people."
"No smooth sharks," Poun nodded. "Dangerous friend-shaped blobby creatures that kill more frequently than a famous predator. Earth is weird."
"It's made us Humans the way we are to this day." Fye smirked, and spotted her would-be insulters attempting to hide by a corner. They had a surprise attack in mind if the improvised weapons were any hint. "You stay right here. I'm about to demonstrate how dangerous a hippo can be."
Poun turned on hir offensensitivity filters and recorded the resulting fracas for the later education of others.
Hippos really were deceptively deadly.
[1] Tumblr says 'hello'.
[Photo by Jonathan Göhner on Unsplash]
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