Hi, guys!
Yesterday I talked about the so-called "map of life". I haven't made mine yet, but I plan to do it today. If only because planning calms me down well, otherwise I have been constantly tense for the last few days. Of course, when you have to put effort into everything, even the simplest actions, it is easy to become tense. Here I have become.
Yesterday, another not-so-pleasant detail came to light. I again tried to sit down to finish the picture, and it turned out that I was still completely burned out as far as the drawing was concerned. My hands literally start shaking even before I start drawing. Naturally, at first I got very angry and spent a lot of energy worrying about what I can’t change right now.
I went to my husband and told him about my problem. Somehow I need to find a way to start painting again, this is my job after all and I need to find a way to want to do it again. We talked for a long time, but none of the solutions he proposed seemed good to me.
Then I decided to calm down, make a cup of tea and consult with other artists on the Internet. I am 100% not a burnout problem, and definitely someone could give me some advice.
I decided not to ask directly, because I no longer had the strength to maintain a dialogue. But I could well watch a video on YouTube on the relevant topic.
There were a lot of them. I already knew that there were a lot of them, and I used to watch a couple, but this time I was looking for something a little more specific. I just don't want to draw. I just want to. Somehow my brain reacts very aggressively to the process and makes me feel terrible even on a physical level.
In the end, it turned out that I didn’t need to look at burnout, but at the video processes of other artists. One of the main problems why this happened at all is that I'm tired of the style I work in, and I want to change it somehow, but I don't know how. And the best way to do this is to look at others.
True, in the end it all ended with the fact that inspiration nevertheless came to me, but it was too late, I was already physically unable to get up. But today I will try again :)
See you in the next post!
Love, Inber