I am thinking about having a child. Concerning this, learning from other people's successes and mistakes is a big priority and opportunity right now instead of doing it myself. One of the things that is fascinating is the relationship between a child in their early years and technology. Most of the approaches are quite radical and at the end of the same spectrum, we have parents that withhold any tech until the age of 3,5, or 7 and parents that use the phone or tablet as a prop, to compensate for their lack of time, or worse. The modern equivalent of the past times when some of us grew up in front of the TV, while our parents were busy working to make enough money to pay the bills.
So, we are told that in the first years of our lives, we are literally like a sponge, accumulating knowledge at an alarming speed. And what did I notice? The children who are not using any smartphone or tablet at all, some not even watching TV, tend to be emotionally more mature, and they can express themselves creatively much better than their counterparts. On the other side, the children who spend more time in front of a screen, any type of screen, or even more than one type in most cases, tend to be more advanced intellectually, to be better with computers, and to learn more words (but this is arguable as if you spend more time reading and telling fairy tales and stories, you can also teach the other group enough new words to equal to the ones using technology instead of spending time with parents. This is by far a better way to educate, as emotionally mature children and teenagers are more successful later in life, even if the technology-addicted group is slightly more intelligent and skilled in tech usage. The kids using technology seem to be more entitled, more disconnected and lack focus and concentration over a longer period.
Of course, once they are old enough, you can work to improve their tech-related skills, and they can learn faster, and focus for longer, so, in theory, they can even catch up with the other group by the time they are 14-18 years old. In the other case, there is a dissonance between the flow of thoughts and emotions, as they can also grow up to be entitled and self-centred. You can notice the difference in observing the reaction to failure, for both groups, the first of them learns that even if you fail, you gain experience and can improve, while the second group sees the world in black or white kind of way, perceiving any failure as a personal one, and losing self-esteem over repeated ones.
What was your strategy growing up, and how did you change it when you had your kids?
All the best,
George
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