LETTERS TO J episode 4 (DEATH)
Dear J.
How did it feel when you died? Because I have heard stories. Stories about death. Stories about the other side. Frightening tales of demons, of three headed dogs, of tortured souls. I've also heard stories of hell. Of a lake of burning sulphur. Of men and women being poured as though from a great bowl into this lake. Scary stories J. I always ask myself, is that what you wanted for us.
You were there when the father, probably high from all of the good things he had made, decided to pick up some dirt and make his best worst creation. Best because they were made in his image. Worst because they're nothing like him. I am nothing like the father J. I know this and you know this. But I'm trying to be. You know I'm trying every single day.
If I'm really trying, why then am I afraid to die? Why does the image of a burning lake flash through my mind each time I lie? Why do I quiver when a gun or knife is pointed at me. Why do I fear to eat with ones I believe are not my friends? Is this fear good? Don't answer that. I already know what you'll say. However, shouldn't the fear of hell guide what I do?
If I am being real, I don't believe the fear of hell has ever worked. I may fear hell, but I fear death more. I may do good, but only because I detest doing bad. I think I should have used the past tense because that is not me anymore.
But I still fear death.
J... How was hell? When you died, did you go there? Did you see the devil? What did he look like? I don't want to die J. At least not tonight. Maybe one day I'll no longer fear death, just like your word says. For now however, I'll run away from whoever runs towards me with a knife.
Your Scared Buddy
Henry Crown
