Hello hivers and happy new week
The definition of love changes overtime and what works for one person might not work for another. These days we are advised that although you should love entirely with your heart but make sure your head is stable in the relationship. People take true love for granted that ends up hurting the true intentions of the genuine lover which in turn makes them something else. This week contest by the #ladiesofhive community allows us to account for how we love either freely or carefully.
The month of love is still in the air. As a lady, what do you consider more: Careful decisions about whom to love, or the freedom to be spontaneous about it? Do you care more about present moments or future results of your decisions? Why?
At my younger age, I used to love spontaneously, freely and joyfully. I guess then the heart was so pure and true that all it wanted was to reciprocated with such true love, but you come to realize that this act of genuity is not appreciated by the other person or whoever receives the act of love. People take it for granted and act like it doesn't matter and ignore it. I remember back then in school, I had a friend who found it difficult in studying and preparing for exams, I took it upon myself to support and be there for her during those tough times because her grades were poor and it was affecting her mentally,it was the second semester of our first year in school,so took it upon myself to offer comfort and reassurance. To be honest, sometimes in the hall, I would help her remember points she might have forgotten. This helped her a lot and it boosted her grades a bit but upon resuming the next session she started hanging out with some other cliques of friends and this literally made us distant till now. Despite all my time and effort, no appreciation whatsoever.
Some other encounter with relationship where you give it your all and at the end it fails has made me realize that careful decisions are necessary in choosing a partner of love. Age also plays a determinant factor because when you are not young anymore, maturity sets in and you only want to be with who is going to be intentional about the relationship and also committed whole heartedly.
For instance, in this present day and time , I try so hard not to start what I cannot finish. If I see that this is contrary to what I can be a part of, I distance myself immediately. Even when I find someone attractive and would love to be with that person at the beginning of the relationship, we sit down, have a discussion on the type of relationship the individual wants to have. I remember one time I was just in love that I didn't know the person was just interested in friends with benefit thingy.
I put the future ahead of me in Being there for someone during tough times, offering comfort and reassurance decisions that has to do with love. Now I consider the most important factors that has to do with love,compatibility, values, communication, and long-term goals. Love is never enough. One thing I love about a relationship is that it should be healthy and a supportive one, I also put into consideration a partner that trust me rather been insecure, one that respects both inside and outside, that we understand our needs and also respect our boundaries.
All these would would determine the future implications of my decision, my marriage, the children, career and even my lifestyle. So when make decisions at my age as a lady, I consider my decisions and also the future implications of my actions.
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