Today it is the Autumnal Equinox here in the Northern hemisphere, the day when the sun changes from the sign of Virgo to the sign of Libra.... the season when the harvest is over, when the time focused on other pursuits — tending crops and the home (Cancer), taking vacations for the self or for play (Leo), and organizing everything for the return to school, work, or plain preparing for the next season (Virgo) — all comes to a close and we can breathe and once again begin to look around us and truly notice and interact with those whom we share space with (Libra). But I digress:
My son and I went this afternoon to check on our cows and as we had the entire afternoon in front of us, we tootled around for a good hour on the backside of the mountain. We’ve known autumn was coming for a while, with the arrival of cooler nights and the grape harvest coming on, but it was such a pleasant, peaceful surprise to see it in full display in the forest. Everywhere, leaves are all shades of red, yellow, and orange-gold, coupled with green and everything in between. It was overcast, but not cold, and there was just enough humidity to release the forest scents. It felt decadent, lush, to drive down the little dirt road and just observe the beauty all around us. It’s times like this I wish I were more adept at painting. Words will have to suffice.
I find myself in a big season of letting go. Much like the trees, I have diligently been releasing old family traumas, past relationship hurts, false masks of my identity, ill-fitting expectations, like leaves into the waiting earth. It feels good at times, painful at others, but much like the self-pruning trees do, I know it will be for my good. In the spring, I will stand straighter, and bloom brighter yet, and I will spread my branches a little further and nurture those in my love and care a bit better.
Do not be afraid to let go.
You deserve to bloom brighter next year as well.