I am sorry to hear you are going through a hard time, but Im glad to see you had the strenght to pick yourself up and continue through the hard times you are having. I am hoping that this too shall pass soon.
As a eastern european I find the news about the russian invasion on Ukraine very unsettling. Just the thought of war in the 21st century is quite absurd in my head and i can't wrap my mind around it. I dont find anything that can justify the slaughtering of innocent people. Even if we put the war aspect aside, and by that I mean soldiers from one side fighting soldiers from the other, the impact these actions will have on the ordinary people is still absurd..

I've also been called pessimistic and, personally, I kind of find that offensive. I would much more describe myself as a realist. Everything we go through in our lives reshapes our mindset and the view we have on life itself. The biggest events that happen to us have the most effect on changing our personality or our vision on life.

I have to note that up until this point I haven't heard of Alain de Botton, but the quote you posted intrigues me very much and I find it interesting to research it further. Thanks for that!

In my experience I have tried and read a few self-help books in the past, but I personally don't find much help in them. For me the best help I can get is the one I give myself, and that comes with time and practice.

Also, I have to note that the saying from your therapist ("We all need to pick up our cross") closely resmbles one we have in our country ("We all need to carry our cross"), but it kind of has the same meaning. It is so much true that i don't have much to add to it. I would only say that the best way to help yourself is to listen to your inner voice and see what it tells you.