Not sure how much I should safely share about any personal details about my own personal life - even if I've shared a lot here, this is a little bit more personal.
It's a milestone nonetheless and something I'm quite proud of, considering my mental state and all the things I've been through.
For years I've suffered through chronic depression and extreme anxiety of all sorts, and lately it's gotten even worse. This worsening doesn't change that in November I was invited to work in a small but respected IT shop in a the neighbouring city to mine, I couldn't pass on the opportunity back then, seeing as how I had never had a job and only had IT experience and some courses on hand.
Now here I am, working.
It was honestly quite hard to leave bed and go to work, my mind fills me with dread, fills me with this weight that tries and ties me to my room, to my home, but I persevered and got into the car.
The entrance to the shop is simple but inviting, and just going past it and seeing its big sign, which I'm afraid to show due to privacy concerns (after all, it's a local business).
I got in, and began my day.
My boss, my first boss, is the sweetest and funniest one I could've hoped for, and the other co-worker I have, such a cool dude as well.
Honestly, not much to complain about.
They love their jokes, they love some good old rock n' roll, they play the guitar, the bass and want me to learn the drums and they're fairly young.
I got some work done. Fixed a laptop's screen, stress-tested a PC with a screwed up CPU-fan and power-supply, PSU was way more screwed up than the fan but that thing is practically e-waste by now.
It wasn't a hard day.
But I still got nervous, and being at home now, I'm already nervous for tomorrow. I'll just try to chill out and play some games. I should really take a shower too.
After work I met with an old friend of mine, hadn't seen her in a while, used to have a crush on her but some things are better off buried 20 kilometers deep in the past. It was nice, it was pleasant, a nice way to end the afternoon in a city I don't usually go that much, but that now I'll be as much as my small little town.
A coastal boy working on an IT shop, just because I got stuck into this passion over a decade ago.
It's crazy how destiny works, but I hope I can keep this up, and not let this be just another failure in my long list.
I was tired of hearing I was useless, now at least I can try and show something, I can try and be something. Thanks for that, boss.
