The reflection of my childhood, which is shaped by reward and punishment, based on result oriented notifications instead of intrinsic motivation.
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The result was important at home, at work and at school; performance was important. I can try, I can learn not to say, or I can not do, I think I fail everything I started. I've been worried often, and sometimes unclear. And every start that this thought motivated changed the whole course of my work. It slowed my learning, made it harder.
Because I couldn't easily learn something I didn't enjoy; I think I should go to a grocery store and I went. What can I do next? I couldn't, I stuck in the mood. I haven't tried the unpretentious, eye-defining recipes that I should add to my own interpretation.
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I've been getting more and more wary of seeing the whole work, seeing, feeling and having a relationship. And so I felt even more insufficient.
Panic! At The Disco - High Hopes (Official Video)
