Temperament, which can be defined as the natural part of our personality that shapes how we interact , react and perceive things around us , which in turn give shape to how people in turn react with us. In my late 20’s, I began to pay more attention to my personality and behavior around people and to situations, a discovery that gave me deep clarity about myself. I found out that my natural temperament is melancholic. For many years, I often felt misunderstood, especially in group settings. I wondered why I preferred quiet reflection over loud conversations, why I noticed details others ignored, and why I often felt emotions deeply, even when I tried to hide them. I had always thought something was “off” with me, but discovering the concept of temperament gave me a whole new understanding of who I truly am and why I react to things more differently than others do.
I go to know more About my own temperament through reading and doing personal research online to improve my self esteem, then I stubble on the material that was discussing how individuals are created with different forms of temperament and it in turn shapes the way they see things, solve problems and go through life in general . The book on personality types that I came across really changed a lot about myself and as I went through the description of the melancholic type ; being thoughtful, sensitive, analytical, loyal, and perfectionist ,I saw myself on every page as I read on. It felt like someone had written my personality word for word with a smile on my face as I read to myself my own temperament. That moment was a turning point in my life.
Ever since that moment, knowing that I am melancholic has greatly contributed to how I live my life. I stopped trying to force myself to fit into other people’s styles. I now embrace my quiet nature with no pressure to fit with another temperament that doesn't align with my well being.my need for order, and my habit of thinking deeply before acting. I learned to work with my natural strengths instead of fighting them. My attention to detail and careful planning have made me more effective in both personal and work related tasks and even at home and around my few friends.
It has also helped my relationships. Instead of feeling weak for being sensitive, I now recognize that my ability to empathize is a gift. I may not speak often, but when I do, my words carry weight because they come from a place of deep thought. I’ve learned to use that wisely.
Emotionally, I’m more in control. I still feel things deeply, but I give myself permission to take quiet time to process and recharge. I also know that my desire for perfection can lead to stress, so I’ve learned to balance that with acceptance and patience for myself and for the people around me . giving room for improvement to others and not letting my temperament inconvenience others either trying to force perfection on them or otherwise.
Knowing my melancholic temperament has allowed me to live with more confidence, peace, and purpose, being in control of my life and things that will happen within.Allowing myself to be real through my deep thinking , I have been able to avoid wrong decisions through proper analysis of situations before making decisions. I no longer see myself as too quiet or too serious. I see myself as intentional, deep, and valuable, just the way I am and created to be magnificent in this trait.