Frustration is often dismissed as a transient by product of thwarted aspirations, a disruptive and uncivilized. Life is full of frustrations. From the minor irritations of losing little things to the major anxieties of continued failure towards a goal, frustration is not a pleasant emotion in any magnitude. Because of the unpleasantness of this emotion, people will often avoid anything that might lead to it. Unfortunately, many of the things we truly want to experience such as triumph, joy, victory and purpose require a great deal of frustration. Being able to manage frustrations allow us to remain happy and positive even in trying circumstances.
Whether you realize it or not, you have achieved all important milestones in your life by experiencing and overcoming frustration. The best examples can be seen in very young children. They struggle for months to take their first steps to become mobile, and they struggle for years to master a language that allows them to clearly express their needs. Prior to this, all an infant can do is cry and hope that a loving parent is able to interpret this expression of frustration in a way that will relieve it.
Even as young adults we experience frustration that motivates us to strive for independence and overcome the challenges of furthering our education, and finding a job. This frustration may develop out many things. We may have a home we want to escape, a dream car that we would like to own, or even want to achieve something as daunting as becoming the best in the world at something.
Unfortunately the brain is not like a good bottle of wine that gets better with age by sitting in a cool dark room. It needs constant pressure to grow, develop, and even maintain skills over time. Our brain and central nervous system hunger for frustration. The gaining of new knowledge, a desire to experience and understand love, and the ability to master a new skill are the things that make our nerve cells buzz with excitement.
A good question to ask yourself is how well you handle frustration. Do you see it as a challenge to overcome, and an opportunity for growth? Or do you yell and scream and hope someone comes to your rescue?
Next time you start to feel that anger or anxiety building, try to stop and think for a minute. Are you trying to blame something or someone else for your feelings? Do you find yourself reaching for food or substances to make those feelings go away? Believe it or not, you may be stunting your brain’s ability to develop new nerve cell pathways that can help you in challenging situations.
TIP TO OVERCOME FRUSTRATION
Step 1: Think of the present
When you are frustrated then you are often somewhere in the future in your mind. Somewhere you wish you would be. Or you are reliving a stumble or failure from your past.
Snap out of those headspaces and calm down by focusing your mind and attention on the present moment.
The sun shining in through your window. The kids playing out in the street and the cars and people going by. The smells and feeling of the clothes and warmth of the sun on your skin. Do this for 1-2 minutes to get your attention back to the present moment.
Step 2: Appreciate what you do have.
After you have pulled your attention back to where it can be most helpful focus it on what is still positive in your life. The quickest and easiest way to do so is to focus it on appreciating what you do have. Spend a few minutes on this and you’ll find much to be grateful for.
Step 3: focus on what you can do right now.
With your attention in the present moment and your mood a more grateful and positive one it is now time to get constructive about what frustrates you.
You can do that by asking yourself:
What is one small step I can take right now to improve this situation?
It may be to see what you can learn from what frustrates you and to try another path towards your goal.
So that you can recharge and then get back into moving towards what you want out of your life in a more focused way.
CONCLUSION
If you are a person that doesn’t handle frustration well, maybe it’s time to turn the corner. Don’t see this as an opportunity to have someone to meet your needs, but find a way to meet them for yourself and find a new way to overcome it. You will gain confidence, and those nerve cells might even start buzzing with excitement again to face the next challenge to come your way.