As I grew up, I always thought that marriage was something that would happen at the right time. However, I soon realized the amount of effort, time, commitment, and financial resources it requires. Early last year, in January, I clearly remember my mother calling me and asking me to sit down to discuss when I would get married. At that moment, I realized that I was old enough to consider marriage and needed to start planning. I told my mother that I had heard her concerns and I would definitely work on it.
To be honest, I don’t find dating hard; what’s challenging for me is finding the right person. Last year, I learned that it’s possible to end up with a good person who just isn’t right for you. Allow me to elaborate on this. You may find someone who possesses many good qualities and think, “Okay, let me try to make this relationship work,” only to discover that you aren’t the right match for each other.
Last year, there was an overwhelming amount of marriages and public displays of affection (PDA) circulating online. However, what these portrayals often fail to convey is how difficult it can be to sustain a relationship. It gets to the point where I sometimes question the authenticity of their feelings and wonder how long their love will last. I know that some people engage in these displays merely for online attention, which makes it hard to believe there is genuine love out there.
Despite seeing all the PDA, I still wish for a connection with someone on a deeper level, not the transactional relationships that seem so prevalent today. It’s disheartening to meet someone who immediately asks, “What do you bring to the table?” or “What do I stand to gain from this relationship?” during our first conversation. This mindset has misled so many individuals.
Speaking of PDA, I once met someone who disliked sharing her relationship online. When I asked her why, she explained that if it didn’t work out, it would hurt less since the whole world wouldn’t know about it. This leads me to my second point: because of this mindset, many people are not fully committed to their relationships. You often hear sentiments like, “Once I’m sure about how you feel, I’ll show my true feelings,” which can be a smokescreen to avoid commitment. If you truly care about someone, express your feelings openly. If they choose not to stay, then they were never truly yours.
Despite the current trend of marriage and PDA, I remind myself not to settle for less and not to rush into a lifelong mistake. Marriage is rewarding, but only when you have the right partner.
Please feel free to leave your comments, upvotes, and re-blog Thanks.
Image from Pixabay
