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OUT OF SIGHT…
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There’s this… this… cruel tinge to life. This… out of sight out of mind happenstance.
Often, someone known, weighed, found wanting, and forgotten often resurfaces, seemingly renewed and transformed, then fresh His and Hellos and I-wanna-get-to-know-yous will trail them.
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Like… a girl you know from real life… here the vast world and many shiny peoples of Facebook hoodwink you, and you forget the people you once dined with, in pursuit of flashy friendships you look to have. “Snow Princess just uploaded a picture”, and you go berserk. You won’t even stop to ask yourself, ‘Snow Princess? Do we have snow in Nigeria?!’
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What happens is that… that girl you abandoned, after years of working on herself and stuff, posts a picture, and it elicits pleasant and flirty comments alike from everyone. You show up, eager to give off an impression that shez your corner girl… that you two go way back. Really, if she doesn’t play along, don’t blame her.
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But I am here to tell you that you should play along. It’s cruel, but it is the way of the world. Out of sight gets to be out of mind. Everyone is responsible for selling themselves, though not necessarily to the highest bidder. The day you don’t open shop, you don’t sell a thing. If it seems like we’re forgetting you, scream “Hey y’all! I’m right here!!!” There are tons of people, and we don’t have the mental space to room everybody. None of us has.
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Nigeria needs a seasoned oil sector administrator to manage NNPC, but they’re not training one. Once you train yourself and are qualified (and from the right tribe), they give you the impression that they’ve been looking for you.
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In 2010 when Terrorism was still trying to take root in Nigeria, one man I worked for was busy preparing his Resume cuz he heard the government was going to create a Terrorism or Alternative Dispute Resolution Department or something. He wanted to be Director-General… because he had a measly MSc in ADR from a university in Belgium or so. If the desirable wasn’t available, he thought…
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Coach Sunday Oliseh has said only players playing in top foreign clubs will get a call up to the Super Eagles; meaning that the journey to the Super Eagles of Nigeria probably starts in England or Spain. It’s like those are the big supermarkets of the world, and Oliseh will only buy from there.
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Bottom line is, you sell yourself. Do not allow yourself to fade from people’s memory. When you show forth, and people aren’t buying, it’s okay to withdraw and rejuvenate yourself. Then you re-emerge.
When you get all those likes and comments, count the ones from old friends… that’s how you know they wish they’d stayed… that’s how you know your value has increased… that’s how you know you’re a Benteke, not a Falcao.
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But know, that if you’ve taken people for granted too much, you end up lonely. You won’t get much love in the mainstream; and when you withdraw to go rejuvenate yourself, and return, people’s coldness towards you will remain. Everybody who loves you and you don’t respond, are all the time working to kill that affection, so they can be free. They will succeed.
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Everybody should try and be nicer, please.
