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Now, I fucking hate FL.
I do.
It's garbage, the weather, the people, the government.. all of it is complete fucking trash.
Now, with that being said...
I'm back...
My route.
My daughter lives in Alabama with her mother, currently.
Pensacola, FL is only about an hour from where they live and her mother actually works in Pensacola.
I'm going to buy a condo there, so that I can get AS MUCH custody as possible.
I'm not playing any games with this.
I haven't seen my baby girl since she was less than 2 weeks old.
Her mother is being vindictive about the fact that our relationship was ugly and HER mother is pushing her to make these absolutely STUPID decisions to try to keep me away from her.
About 4-7 days ago, I got a call from my lawyer telling me that she's for sure mine and that they're going to send me the results, but that his assistant insisted that he call me beforehand and tell me the news personally.
I'm glad he did.
I started to cry on the phone, breaking down, knowing that she was finally 100% actually mine...
I mean.. My heart knew LONG before my mind did.. I felt a feeling when she was born.. This.. Deep feeling.. Unlike anything I've ever felt.. Almost as if there was an unseen ENERGY of some sort.. Idk how to explain it.. but I thought for sure that something like that couldn't be faked and my heart knew FOR SURE.. but now my head understands..
I've never felt a bond so strong, with anything or anyone.
It also sparked something inside of me over the next day or two after finding out the news..
It made me realize that even though I am HAPPY in California.. FOR NOW, I need to be as close as possible to my daughter, so that I may get as much time with her as I can.
I decided that it was the ONLY real option.
My baby girl needs her father.
I need my baby girl.
I honestly feel as though she's the only real reason I have to live.
I love her more than myself and I can't wait until I get to see her. It should be soon! :)
It's been a LONG ass journey getting from the West to the East.. but I made it.
The trip wasn't TOO exciting.. but I DID get arrested by border patrol and then released!
I will write about that in my upcoming posts documenting the trip! :)
