Today I'll be talking about something I think has been holding some folks backwards in life. This is called the victim mentality and I will be discussing on cause, traits and how to curb or stop this personality trait. So what is Victim mentality.
This is an acquired personality trait in which a person tends to recognize themselves as a victim of the negative actions of others, and to behave as if this were the case in the face of contrary evidence of such circumstances- Wikipedia.
I will also like to define who a victim is to have a clearer picture of this trait and to distinguish it from folks who have really gone through a bad spell:
a victim is described as someone who has been harmed even though he was not responsible for the incident and could not prevent the same, and therefore, deserves empathy.
So when a victim of abuse or manipulation becomes trapped in a cycle of victimisation the above personality trait is said to occur. Not only is this mentality harmful to the individual displaying it but it also have adverse effect on the people around such individual.
From the above definition it is clear victim mentality has no biological or genetical basis which means it is learned and it can be changed or eliminated. It is actually caused by an actual event during developmental phase mostly in childhood, an unfortunate event occurs or the individual is wrongly treated by others due to no fault of the victim. This leads to the generalisation that life is unfair and folks will always treat them badly which is not the case. An example of this is an armed robber who feels he or she is into into crime because of an immoral world and believes security operatives such as the police are persecuting them unfairly.
The following are recognizable in individuals with victim mentality:
The individual believes he/she is treated unfairly always and is wronged due to no fault of theirs though an unbiased analysis may suggest they may be partially or completely responsible for the situation.
They are pessimists: every new event is seen as a potential disaster and are usually the first to spot the reason why a venture will not go well.
They feel the world is out to get them always for doing absolutely nothing always.
These individuals believe they have no control over anything in life and when they experience a setback they do absolutely nothing about it. Instead they focus on the negative always.
They are paranoia and are always suspicious of the intentions of others. This prompts them to be guided by negative emotions such as fear, jealousy, resentment, anger, sadness e.t.c.
The victim does not take reponsibility for his/her actions and blames others for all his misfortunes.
The individual wants all and sundry to sympathise with him/her and wants to be commended for going through such disaster.
Such individuals are spinners, they spin negavitity in order to attract sympathy. This is done through exaggeration of events or an outright lie.
They are always in a defensive mode and when friends try to pull them out of this viscious cycle they rather seek justification of their actions. They also view neutral views negatively.
Self pity is prevalent among folks with this mentality, they generally believe everyone gets a better deal or shot at life than them.
It is important this learned trait is changed or eliminated as is affects both the sufferer and those around him. The following hints would allow the individual to step out of this abnormal trait:
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