Dinner is a great first date. Don't believe that stuff about girls not wanting to eat on a first date - sharing a romantic meal is so sexy.
~ Carmen Electra
I had just got myself ready and my stomach was full of butterflies. Did my hair look right? Did my pants hug my bum in the right way?
It was a million questions even before I arrived.
Today I met the man of my dreams and I couldn't have wished for a more disastrous night, but if we look back on it in years to come, I think it will be a lovely memory.
I arrived at the restaurant early, but he was already there and he'd chosen a table that was away from the rest, in a cozy corner. There was beautiful soft music playing and he'd had the candle on the table lit. There were only a handful of other people in the place which was nice, it meant less noise and more space to share without trying to hear the other person over the chaos.
The clothing I chose said "I'm casual but classy", but on the inside I was a mess of butter fingers and butterfly nerves. It was kind of intoxicating. When I walked in, he looked up and stood to greet me. I tried so hard to play it cool but he could probably read me like a book.
We shared massive smiles as we'd known each other remotely for a while, but this was our first official "date". He looked smart, an easy line between too much and too little - his clothing was impeccable without a crease or wrinkle where they normally reside. It was a tad intimidating to be honest but spoke of effort and care.
He pulled out the chair for me to sit down and I obliged, what a gentleman. I knew he was but it was a whole other ballgame being treated so nicely in person. We shared chit chat about how we were, how much we had been looking forward to this and there actually wasn't any awkwardness, it was just perfectly comfortable. We made jokes with each other and I laughed probably louder than I should have, but I couldn't help it, he was a funny guy.
Our waiter came and proceeded to tell us about the menu options and I chose steak - why? Because I take eating seriously and I don't eat like a bird because I'm not one. He ordered fish and we had a mushroom starter to share.
The food was delicious but I think it was made better by the company. I was able to look into his eyes and melt a little more each time he smiled at me. He has such a gorgeous smile and his laugh is absolutely contagious. We tucked into the meal together and we both asked each other how the food is at the same time. We were running together in perfect cohesion and synchronicity. It was like a piece of emotional classical music.
We had coffee together and spoke about all the intricacies of our lives, about what we like and dislike, about how we handle conflict and some of the most ridiculous work stories. We started to wind down the perfect date with coffee and I felt reluctant to let it end.
I needed to use the restroom so I excused myself and you won't fucking believe what happened.
So you remember I wore the jeans that hugged my bum in just the right way? Wrong way I'm thinking now.
I had forgotten that I tucked my phone into my back pocket when I was locking my car and my bum hugging pants kicked it out and sploosh. In the loo!
Panic quickly overtook the moment and without even thinking I plunged my hand into the bog and retrieved my now soaked equipment. Feeling like an absolute idiot, I wrapped it in toilet roll and then proceeded to wash my hands with heaps of gel soap up to my fucking elbows. It would have been one thing had it been my own toilet, but shoving my hand into a public bathroom toilet is definitely not on my bucket list.
While mentally berating myself I pulled myself together and straightened out my clothing in the mirror. I then changed the toilet roll around the phone and washed my hands again just to be sure. Sheepishly I walked out of the ladies' room and back to the table not knowing where to put my toilet phone. I decided that it wouldn't go on the table so I pulled up a chair from the side of the table and plonked it down on there.
Intrigued he asked if I was ok, said he was trying to work out if his company and conversation had been so bad that I was trying to escape out of the bathroom window. I told him what had happened and he looked incredulous. Feeling like an idiot doesn't look good on me but I owned it. Said I was trying to test the pH of the water with my specially designed equipment. I have sensitive skin you know.
With a smile, he took his phone out of his back pocket and placed it on the table then said he'd be right back, he needed to use the restroom too. I took it as a sign of trust and commiseration.
A minute later I was presented with a takeaway box by the waiter. I was a bit confused now thinking he was climbing out the window and this was a diversion tactic but the waiter opened it to reveal a sizeable amount of dry rice and told me it was for my phone.
He had asked for dry rice. For me. This was the sweetest man, the most considerate offering I've ever received.
This weekend I met the man of my dreams and I dropped my phone in the loo - he melted my heart with his smile and a bowl of rice!
The image is mine