Hahahaha had great pleasure reading your pretty funny post!
Whenever I read: TAH Records, I kinda read ATH Records. High all the Time! Sounds pretty cool to me :)
I know a shortcut for you guys. Record soundless music. Create one coloured artwork, let's say: black. With that much of the steps will go much more quickly. Side B could carry a variation to the soundless music on side A: randomness... like in white noise.
Wish you guys a lot of fun and success with all the steps! ;)