When you are alone, I mean, really alone. Not just because there is anybody around, also because you've been left behind by a goberment, family and friends, in this case, you might say a desert is the sorounding of you.
This days, in my spare time, I was looking a TV shows that only makes you feel more left behind... Brides expending more than 2000$ in a dress? really? I envy those women!. This situation is like touching the painful side in me, that deep down in my heart is like I mentioned before: painful. Yeah, is redundant, but there is no other way I see to explain it. Somehow my senses are only touched by pain, is all I know right now, how can I be optimistic about it? If all I see in my country is dead, hunger, pain, a goberment making rules for themselfs and letting me behind of their decisions, and becareful of saying something against them, they might "suicide you" while they do tortures... Is that really all I have to hope for? That's why I want to leave my country, but at the same time, not knowing how to be an inmigrant is about. How other latinamerican and american people has treated venezuelan makes me wonder... I'm I welcome in other place? Do I really deserve to survive? the only thing is holding me back in my country is finding the money to travel, and even if I find it... Is there something I can do? like a job for me? Maybe... Right?
I remember what it is to have a job, but also walking 4.5km around my city because the lack of transportation and trying to find food or something to buy with the money I've made... I have the sense in other place it is not like that, I don't know, but from what I've heard of family and friends in Chile and USA it seems it is a different life style than that I'm used to here in Venezuela, a lifestyle where having a normal job makes sense, either way in an office or a big enterprise, the salary you earn is enogh to eat and paying rent.
I brought to you the image of a desert, a place where there is nothing more valuable than you, or a place free of distractions, where you can truly find yourself... That's my country, Venezuela, a desert, an exhausting one, where you fight to survive while you plan a future in other place... At least that's what I'm doing, some other people see in Venezuela a bussiness oportunity and are mercyful enough to continue investing, persons that struggle every day with the inflation and government politics that are made of to destroy production of big and small bussines. There is no way it can benefit venezuelan as the government is trying to make us see, but what can you do? survive? agreed with them on TV so you may not be "suicide" by them after tortures?
So many questions... Only a short answer... I can't believe I'm still alive, thanks to God I see each day as it is, a miracle. In the desert, where everything offered on TV shows are only real in other countries, here is an illusion: a full fridge, enough money to buy or sell, car parts, constant electricity and water services, fast internet, I see all that on TV, but when I face my reality, it only is an illusion and I'm just in a desert, has it's advantages, also feels like true poverty, even with money that inflation turns into sand.
