Laying in bed. Head doing miles again. Anxiety through the roof past 3 days or so. Chest pains. Almost ambulanced last night. Heart rate was up in the mid 100s. All I was doing was laying in bed then a thought appeared. Then half hour later I was still having that internal argument.
And tonight's yay thought is the realisation that I'm nearly 40 and I've done nothing. Not worked in nearly 10 years (apart from the cleaning with mum 3 days a week but that was 4 years ago)
No savings. No family. Hell, I just struggle to come up with 6 friends that, if they knew I'd died, would attend my funeral.
And 2 of those can't stand me, but hang around because like Me they're also alone.
And this is the stuff that I deal with every day.
Now u know why I'm so funny in discord and stuff.
While you guys are filling my empty void I have less time to think about this crap.