Greetings @bleujay, thanks for stopping by.

Sounds like you have your point of purpose and meaning in the form of Scripture and the attendant lessons, which I think is a beautiful thing.

From a spiritual perspective, what I suppose I often catch myself in is something that periodically afflicted monks at monasteries, commonly referred to as a acedia, loosely translated as "spiritual sloth" but actually goes far deeper than that. It's more a case of the daily slipping into a state of automated routine, rather than truly being present. For example, to continue the spiritual direction, morning prayers becoming routine because "it's just what you DO at 9:00am" rather than it being a sincere and present connection to God, if that makes sense.

All the best to you, as well!