I was scammed out of six grand when I first arrived in the countryside, all wide-eyed and innocent. A group of men in yellow jackets turned up at the gate, offering to resurface my long driveway with materials they claimed were left over from a council job.

“Cheap, missus,” they said.

Then they dribbled a thin line of tar along the 300-metre drive, scattered a few hundred pebbles, and demanded €6,000, with just enough menace to make it clear that resistance was futile.

Apparently it's a well-know scam.