The stupidest thing I heard this week was my brother telling me I should take the profits on my gold holdings and buy more gold with it.:)

I'm not sure about that. Elections cancelled due to war perhaps?

"We're all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars' (The divine Oscar) But yes, I agree. We've reached peak absurdity and we've nowhere to go from here.

Hmm. That sounds lovely in theory, but if we were only s awesome as dogs, would we have invented the wheel?

That, we must!

Oh Lord, it’s so hard to be humble when you’re perfect in every way:) I have, in the past, had many suitors, but alas, I’m cursed with impossibly high standards. Thank you for being part of my devoted

No, alas not. He's still alive and kicking and as creepy as ever.

You have to be direct with men. You can't be tactful. They just take that as a come-on:)

Well you only look about 16 years old, so with a 20 year friendship under your belt, you're off to a flying start:)

That's friendship rule number one: you're never too busy to answer a friend's call....unless you're being chased by an angry roo, and even then, maybe put them on speaker:) And sorry, but I cannot get

I far exceed my expectations of others. But then, I no longer expect very much of other people. People just ain't what they used to be:)

IKEA? Holy sheets, I'd rather poke my eyes out with a stick:)

If it wasn't for inheriting my father's protruding ears, I could easily have believed the stork was blown off course in strong winds and I was misdelivered:)

My brother used to do that when he was young, liberate plants from other people's gardens to give them a better life in ours:)

My parents were never forthcoming about where I was born. ‘Somewhere in Cabra,’ my mother would say whenever I asked. I’m not even sure she remembered herself. Legend has it they sailed back from England

I couldn't be fitter, leaner or healthier!:)

Thank you @nikv. Very kind of you.

We need to crowdfund some anti-aircraft missiles!

When you put it that way, it makes perfect sense. I completely forgot about the breeding part. That alone takes half a lifetime! A trip to Greece will definitely fuel your wanderlust. You might even make

Very kind of you Mr. G. Thank you. @galenkp