I knew I was always destined to be something great cause mama always told me I would be. She was the one person to always see the good in me even when I couldn't find it in myself. Mama passed away last year from breast cancer and it's been hard living here without out her. They say you never truly miss a person until they gone and now I know exactly what they mean. My big brother G been taking good care of me just like he promised mama he would do. G been grinding in the streets extra hard since mama passed but I know he only doing it to make sure I'm well taken care of. I know he can look out for himself but I don't wanna lose my brother to this street life that's why I'm trying as hard as I can to become the next America's Next Top Model. But this modeling shit ain't cheap. I'm glad I met James cause he the one that pays for most of the things I want to do to better my career. I'm not in love with him because he's to jealous, controlling and on top of that he's married, but his money does help out. I don't like depending on G for everything, he does enough for me already. Once I make it big I'm gonna pay him back for always being there for me. When will I make it big is the problem though? Where we live it's not to many modeling agencies out here so I have to go to other cities to audition for the jobs I want.That's no problem though cause G bought me a Lexus truck for my graduation so i'm able to move around when I want to. All that driving back and forth and not making a lot of money is the problem though. I told G we should move to a bigger city but he doesn't wanna do because this house is all we had left of mama and he don't wanna sell it and neither do I. Plus all his connects is right here and he thinks it's trouble trying to hustle in big cites so I truly understand how he feels. But I know if I really want to make it big I need to get away from here. But I don't wanna leave my brother here by himself after all he's done for me. So for now I'll just make the commute back and forth until I get to where I want to be. This shit is hard but what can I do to change it.
