I accept becoming best friends, but we need to really nail down what man we would wanna run a train on then. John Stamos is kind of old and bloated these days. I vote for someone more like Tom Hardy, Chris

I mean, you could have declined and I would have totally understood. I can only imagine how flaccid and dry you must have felt listening through Limp Bizkit music. Good idea for the workaround though,

That sucks some dirty asshole, man. Sorry you've gotta deal with such a shitty situation.

Sounds like a pretty sick event, man. Hope it's successful and makes your taint all warm and fuzzy, baby.

Yeah, I wasn't expecting a huge outpour of suggestions. Was just hoping a few of you slutterbutts might have some good suggestions. Also, that is beyond fucking ridiculous. Jeff Bezo's probably wouldn't

Looking forward to it! Especially the part of having to subject you to some of the worst music ever produced in the last 25 years!

I request a cover of any Limp Bizkit song of your choice. Nothing would make me more flaccid, yet also happy at the same time.

Yep. From what I gathered after looking into it, he went the hippy route for awhile, then realized it wasn't working or helping. He tried to get some treatment afterwards, but it was too late and he passed

I'm still in absolute awe in how much of an idiot this guy was at the end of his life. It's honestly impressive someone so innovative who revolutionized tech would basically announce he was going to battle

I'll dig my nipples into some reviews and see what I can expect from it, I suppose. The Shure looks like a good option as well, but I'd have save up some more cash and grab a used one from good old Ebay.

Yeah, I thought about just getting another Gaming headset as a possible option, but, if I'm going to ever record some music with it having a dedicated microphone would probably be a better option. I don't

The snowball looks like a good option and is just a tad over my price range, but possibly doable. Do you have experience with Blue mics yourself? I've heard a lot of steamers on Twitch and Youtube say

Ah, I should have opened it and checked for a secret giftcard then. Hell, I'd have been happy with a secret stash of Krokodil even.

I dunno how to feel about that Ripley 8 figure. Does Alien 4 have a large enough fanbase to warrant that figure? Makes me feel pretty flaccid and dry. Though those Godzilla figures do make my taint feel

Of course, that's what I'm always here for. To remind you of tortured nipples, penises and things that are stinky ass.

Oh, no. We brought the cat lady figure home. I put away the coffee mug I was going to get and just got that instead since my fiancee also demanded we save it from being a semen dump for some drugged out

Fun fact: The sound effect for when a character starts running in this show sounds disturbingly similar to the acoustics of when a fat piss hits the toilet water.

We could combine forces and make the ultimate feminist figure. Though, then all the male feminist on social media would probably want it so they can bait women into their BDSM sex dungeons.

I'd be mad too if some moist weirdo who talks about people being turbo virgins purchased me and tossed me on a book shelf!

Sorry for your loss, man. Hope you guys are coping well. I'm sure some random guy who talks about twisting nipples, fleshlights and the good fight against turbo virgins isn't your first choice to turn