Hello everyone hope you are having a blissful day,today I am writing on silence struggles. Enduring your pain alone to protect others.
You see, life is like a journey that is filled with ups and downs, sometimes the ups are good and the downs can be extremely difficult. There are moments we find ourselves distressed emotionally, mentally or physically yet we choose not to tell anyone but suffer in silence. Yet we put on a smiley and brave face,we smile through pain and tell everyone around us that we are fine, because we don't want them to worry. Fighting our demons is something all of us experience but we rarely talk about it with people. From our younger age, many of us were taught to be strong. We see our parents hide their struggles to protect us,our friends downplay their pain to avoid being a burden and our mentors emphasize perseverance over expressing weaknesses. As a result we learn to privatize our suffering believing that agreeing to our struggles is a sign of failure.
I remember a time when I was going through some personal difficulties from work getting all series of insults, disrespect,look down on. Yet everytime am asked if I am fine ,my reply is always “yes am fine” . I didn't want my parents to lose sleep over my stress. And also didn't want my friends to feel obligated to console me . So I carried my pain and weight alone, pretending everything was fine and under control. One of the things we humans hide our pain is the fear of becoming a burden.we believe our problems are ours alone to bear and shearing it would be like making others suffer for our problems and the last thing we want is to add more problems to others.
Sometimes there is this fear of getting misunderstood,what if our pains are not taken seriously,what if they dismiss it as trivial.The thought of opening up only to be judged and misunderstood can sometimes be terrifying, so we retreat in silence convincing ourselves that is better to suffer in silence than to risk rejection and or pity. While keeping our struggles and pain to ourselves may seem noble, it can lead to loneliness and pain thrive in isolation. Anytime we keep our emotions to ourselves,they grow. At times we may appear composed on the outside but Inside we suffer and crumble. The very people we are trying to protect may sense that something is wrong,yet our insistence that everything is fine leaves them helpless. I remember sometimes I'll just sit in my room feeling bad about myself and refusing to share what was disturbing me, I just put a smile around my family and friends for them not to understand what was going on with me. At those moments I felt guilty of hiding the fact that I have something disturbing me which I refuse sharing ,with no one seeing and understanding what was wrong with me. It was a vicious cycle. I didn't want them to worry but by also not telling them,I denied in myself the comfort I desperately need.
No one can endure endless pain, suffering in silence forever.there is always a dark point,a moment when the mask slips and the pain can no longer be held again, I reach my breaking point on one ordinary evening a simple question are you okey from my mom shattered my defense, the pain I had held back for sometime came out with tears, to my surprise instead of being burden my mom gave me a listening mother's ear, she didn't see me as a weak person instead saw me as human and said is good to have fear but I have to learn to speak to someone when I have something on my mind. That moment taught me a valuable lesson, sometimes the people who love us want to be there for us and share our pain not because they want to but because they care.
In summary , hiding our pain to protect others is an act of love,but it's not always the right thing to do. While our intention may be good. Silence can lead to more suffering for both us and others who care about us. True connection comes with honesty from allowing ourselves to be seen even in our weakest moment.
Thanks for reading.
