ONE ADULT THING I SHOULD KNOW HOW TO DO BY NOW BUT I'M STILL LEARNING: HOW TO DRIVE A CAR: LOH#307

Yes, there are things a proper adult should confidently know how to do.

Pay bills without fear.
Cook a decent soup without calling your mother.
Say no without feeling guilty.
And, drive a car.

I am in my thirties.
I have written about maturity, about money, about village life.
People read my posts and think this guy is mature.

But let me confess today on Ecency via Ladies of hive.
I am still figuring out how to drive a car.

Growing up, I thought driving was easy. You just sit, turn steering, press accelerator. Even keke drivers do it. How hard can it be?

Then I remembered my own car crash experience I shared here. I was a high school student when my friend's brother crashed with us inside. Since that day, part of me fears the steering.

But the adult life in Enugu and Abakaliki doesn't care about your fear. Everybody expects that as a man, you should know how to drive. If you don't, you never enter adult class.

How I usually handles it when it comes up.
I have two strategies. Both are shameful 😂.

Strategy 1: The corporate liar.
Someone once says guy, help me move this car small.
I said, my hand is paining me. I just barb. You know steering and fresh barb no dey go.
Any excuse.

Strategy 2: The Overconfident Student.
When I actually have to drive, I become overly careful. I adjust mirror for 10 minutes. I wear seatbelt like a pilot about to fly to London. I hold steering at 10 and 2 like my driving instructor spirit entered me.

Inside me, I am praying, God, please don't let anybody come close.

The funny, stressful, eye opening experience.
Last month, my uncle in the village said, take the car and go and buy fuel in the next village.

Small Toyota. Manual. I said yes to impress my cousins.

I entered. Started the car and it started. First gear, it moved. I was happy. I don sabi now.

Then I reached the village market crowd, okada, women selling akara on the roadside.

A goat crossed. I panicked. Instead of brake, I pressed clutch and accelerator together. The car made vrooom like an angry lion. The goat jumped. Market women shouted heyyyy.

I finally pressed brake, but I forgot to remove leg from clutch. Car jumped and stopped right in front of an old woman's table. Her groundnuts scattered everywhere.

She looked at me. I looked at her.
Then she said, pay me for my groundnuts.

Are you learning to drive?

My cousins behind me wanted to die laughing. I wanted the ground to open.

I came down, helped her pack her groundnuts, bought all of them out of shame at 2000 naira groundnut I don't even eat.

We pushed the car to the side. An 11-year-old boy came and said, uncle, shift make I pack am for you. And he parked the manual car perfectly in few seconds.

That day my ego died.

I realized many of us adults are like this. We pretend we know. We are driving life, relationship, finances, career, without proper driving lessons. Just vibing.

We fear to say I don't know this yet because we think adult must know everything. But that is how we crash.

So now, I am actually learning. No more forming. I registered with a driving school in Enugu last two months. One day the instructor shouts clutch brake like a soldier. But I am learning properly.

Because true maturity like I wrote before is not about forming that you know everything. It is about being civil enough to admit you are still learning.

So if you see me on the road next month driving slowly with my learner sticker, please don't honk too much.

I am becoming a proper adult. One gear at a time.