If we had been honest with each other, I think almost everyone has been in a toxic relationship but to some people, that's what they call love while for others it's not which is why Yoruba's will say ( Nkan to ko waju si e, o ko e yin si elomi) which mean we are all seeing things from a different perspective.
I would never have experienced a toxic relationship if not because I was trying to make it work, most of my close friends have really known me for a short-term relationship
What I mean by short is that I have been in relationships that only lasted two weeks and it wasn't my fault but people are always saying I don't try to make it work and all sorts of other things so I got into this relationship and I was determined to stay and make it work to please people and not myself which is something I'm never going to try again because this was what made me experience what toxic relationship was all about.
I could have ended things the exact day we started our relationship after she mistakenly saw a picture of a lady on my phone who happens to be my ex. It wasn't like she saw it by mistake, I was the one who unlock my phone and gave it to her because I don't want her to feel lonely while I went to get something outside because her phone was switched off.
I know the picture was there, a normal human being would have asked regarding the date of the picture and the current date but she flare up and made a heated argument out it calling me names, I try to calm the situation down and after 2 days of argument, it was resolved.
I sat myself down that day and made a stupid decision because people think I'm the bad person in every relationship that I have been, so we continued our relationship and it got to a point that I can't post any lady's picture on my status because it would lead into a serious argument.
I can't see any of my female friends or talk about a lady and even my best female friend who was the one that made us know each other. At first, I thought it was something normal but gradually I started becoming a loner, I started losing good people in my life just because of her while she actually would go to a guy's house who was flirting with her on the phone and I wasn't fighting her over it, she post guys but I can't.
It went to a point whereby once there is a quarrel between her and her dad because her mom and her dad are not on good terms and she has been supportive of her mom, I tend to feel the heat where I get insulted about something I know nothing about, and this was just months of been together then I said to myself this as to stop. So I call her and sat her and told her I don't want this thing you do anymore, that what was my offense? She explained with a lot of crying and promising me she will stop, my mind didn't believe anything she said but I didn't care, I love my girl and was determined to make it work, only if I had known.
It kept on repeating itself, and she started doing it on her status on WhatsApp which is regarded as public after a lot of forgiveness I concluded it was time to forgive myself for the punishment I gave myself and let her go, because she claims it to be anger issue and if you have anger issue and can't work on it after you promise to for 10 different times I don't think she would get better.
But before that decision, dapomola the happy boy, was now the sad one, the overthinker, the mentality drain person, I lost myself, didn't know who I was again, I was starting to be an alcoholic, and even after I told her that I wasn't interested anymore that we should part way, I had to start running away from my house because she comes knocking anytime and in between I started drinking to get some sleep and even had to leave the internet because I just get random messages from people talking about her, some insult some apologizing on her behave.
I had to tell her to give me some time to think and just after a month I said that, she was with another guy so our journey ended like that and I started to unveil some truths I didn't know about her. It took me months before I could get back to being myself and it has been almost 2 years now and I'm still healing alone.
I'm happy I made that decision to leave because I would have became something else by now if I had stayed a month earlier and I always Thank God, there wasn't an unwanted pregnancy situation.
I hope people can learn this and always embrace love and peace.
