People are usually drawn towards the occult and magick because of the promise of an improved life. Most people are looking for wealth or love and often both at the same time. By sharing my own story I hope to give you an idea where to go, should you wish to find love through magick.
Before I did cast my ultimate love spell, I wanted nothing to do with love magick. For a long time I considered it to be somehow off. It seemed wrong to use magick to attract a partner. I worried that magick would manifest not a genuine love, but a short term infatuation with, most likely, the wrong person. I didn’t want to manipulate anyone. Whenever you read about love spells you get all the warnings about wrong spells causing more trouble than its worth etc. Life is often like that. You hold a certain point of view and reality comes along to question it and prove you wrong. From the perspective of time, I was probably also worried that it won’t work and bring disappointment. After all, I used to say that a love spell, in my situation, would be like calling for rain in the desert.
It was 2008, I was doing a media course at the college hoping to learn film making. After living in the UK for over two years, my indie band fell apart, which left me without a social circle. My earnings were barely enough to cover my living costs, I could not afford going out and I ended up socially isolated. My colleagues at the college were very friendly but we lived in different worlds, besides working and studying left me little free time to spare. My love life was limited to a few one night stands that left me feeling rather disappointed and discouraged. I felt deprived of both intimacy and friendship.
Being Happy
Being by yourself has its clear downsides, but all in all, I was content. My life, with all its hardship, was still much better than what it would have been, if I had stayed in Poland, living dependent on my family. For the first time, I had my own income, a room all to myself and a private space to practice magick. I felt incredibly empowered by all the freedom this gave me. My long term goals were to live by doing magick, art and writing. It was an adventure and I was prepared to take risks and make sacrifices in order to fulfil my aspirations. I figured that if I ever wanted to be happy in a relationship, that relationship has to be based on a shared professional life.
There is a good lesson to take away from that. In my experience it is easiest to find true love when you feel happy with who you are and you enjoy time spent by yourself. In such a situation you end up with much better judgement regarding your potential partners. If you can not be happy by yourself, what makes you think you will be happier with the two (or more) of you.
On the flip side to that, we are all human and we need closeness and sex. There is no escaping that. We can not fully substitute for the company of another person. In the next part I will talk about a practice that I found very helpful in navigating between developing self love and seeking it from a partner.