Hey! It was pretty tough for me to go through the wedding cancelling. First it was about the audacity to say I am done. I was shamed for being from a separated family , receiving replies as: you will not have so many people, what will people think of us, that we are poor, as if I was not cool enough because my parents were divorced and I did not have so many relatives to cash in for the wedding. His infidelity somehow was the cherry on the top. Now looking back it was the best painful thing that could have happened to me. I would have been divorced or ill if I would have married that guy. The love was long gone, if it has ever been there. I have learned a lot , the signs we were not a good fit were there all along, I was blind to them and it took me years until I mustered the courage to say I am out of here. My mental and emotional health were so crushed that cancelling all and getting out was for my survival.
I did a lot of mistakes in relationships and I now can begin to grasp what mature safe love would feel and what my needs are as a woman because I changed a lot. I need and deserve to be with a man that is emotionally safe for me and likes me as I am, valuing and respecting me as a human being before anything else. To feel safe is healing for the soul.

Noise and crowds in such an intimate moment would stress me out too. I guess it boils down to being with someone who shares the same feeling about this matter. Otherwise why go along with a wedding you do not truly like?
Thank you for reading me🤗