I stood in line for thirty minutes tonight so I could get my covid booster.
It was free, but even if it wasn't, I could afford it.
The middle-aged man yelling in the middle of the street as I walked out all bandaged and leveled-up? He couldn't afford it.
Even though it was free.
He didn't know he deserved it.
"Come out of the street," a security guard said kindly. "We don't want you to get hit by a car."
He obliged.
I rounded the corner and left that world behind.
A crow was pecking around my car, looking for scraps or worms in the grass. They flew up to a nearby power line and observed me from a safe distance.
I reached into my center console and pulled out a couple pistachios.
I clucked my tongue.
I tossed the nuts onto the sidewalk.
The crow looked down at me.
Waited for me to walk away.
"Murmulmulrmol the birds?" a voice called out to me.
I looked up.
There, in the middle of the road, was the man from around the corner.
"What did you say?" I asked.
"Are you feeding the birds?"
"Yeah, it was just a pistachio."
The emaciated drifter looked into my eyes. He opened his mouth. His voice was small as a six-year-old boy's.
"I wanna feed the birds."
I looked at him. I didn't say anything. I was afraid of him.
I got into my car.
He wandered off.
I drove away.
Turning down the road towards home, I said his words aloud.
I wanna feed the birds.
I said more words aloud. Words to try and make sense of his situation. To make sense of a level of financial and emotional destitution in which one can't even feed the birds he lives amongst day after cold, grey day.
I couldn't come up with anything good.
In my fantasies I go back and I find him. Tomorrow. Next week. I hand him a bag of all the things crows love to eat. I teach him how to feed the birds, and, in turn, the birds teach him how to feel present and safe, as they taught me.
In reality, I am too scared of him.
And he would just yell at me from the middle of the street.
This is my entry for the #monomad challenge, held daily in the Black and White Community.
Give it a try.
It's also a 
instagram: @se_pdx_crows
Art in NFT Showroom
a percentage of this post's rewards goes back to support the community
All the stuff (pictures, words, etc.) I put in this post and any of my other posts is mine (unless otherwise stated) and can't be used by anyone else unless I say it's ok and you go with me to bring that guy a bag of peanuts.
