Hello Community,
When people hear the words white lie they usually think of something harmless.. If I am being honest I think almost everybody has told a white lie at some point in their life.
I know I have told a lie.
These white lies are not the kind that destroys trust or causes problems but the kind where you are trying to avoid hurting someones feelings,For example when a friend asks if their new haircut looks good and you do not exactly love it, you do not want to completely crush their confidence. These little situations happen all the time with lies.
Now does that make telling lies okay?
Well that is where things get complicated with lies.
Personally I think intention matters a lot when it comes to lies, there is a difference between telling a white lie to protect yourself from accountability and telling a white lie because you are trying to spare someone unnecessary pain with white lies.
For example imagine someone is going through a period in their life, Maybe they failed an exam lost a job or are dealing with something heavy, Sometimes people do not need honesty at that exact moment, Sometimes they need encouragement first with lies.
That said, I do not think white lies should become a habit.
The problem with lies, even small ones is that they can grow. One white lie often leads to another lie and before you know it you are trying to remember what story you told to which person about the white lie, That is one headache I do not want with lies.
I have also seen situations where people used the phrase "I was just trying to protect you" as an excuse to hide truths with white lies, In those cases the white lie usually ends up causing damage than the truth would have caused in the first place with white lies.
For me if the truth involves something that directly affects a persons life with white lies then they deserve to know it about the white lie.
It might hurt
It might be uncomfortable
They might even be angry
At least they can make decisions based on reality .
On the hand if we are talking about small everyday situations where the truth serves no real purpose other than hurting somebodys feelings with then I can understand why people sometimes choose a gentler approach with white lies.
I think there is also a difference between being honest and being harsh
Some people pride themselves on telling it like it is, but sometimes they are just being unnecessarily rude, You can tell the truth, Still be kind about it, Those two things can exist.
Personally if I had to choose I would still lean more toward honesty than telling lies, Maybe not always the full blunt version of the truth immediately. Honesty eventually.
Because trust is one of those things that's very difficult to rebuild once it is broken with white lies.
If somebody discovers that you have been lying to them with lies even for what you believed was a good reason they may start questioning everything else you have told them about white lies.
That is where problems begin with white lies.
So do I think white lies are always wrong?
No.
Do I think they should be used carefully with lies?
Absolutely.
At the end of the day I think the goal should be kindness without deception whenever possible, If you can tell the truth in a way that is respectful, compassionate and considerate, that is usually the better option
Because while a white lie may make things easier for a moment honesty tends to last longer.
