It took me a long time and a lot of hard learned and relearned life lessons to find out what happiness and fulfillment actually entails. I have wanted "better" things for so long, but found that they didn't bring me the completion I wanted or needed. It took understanding that I might not "deserve" the things I desired. These things were not entitled to me and I to them. This wasn't, hasn't and still is not an easy thing to accomplish. To quote to the 1999 movie classic, The Matrix, "It is one thing to know the path, it is another to walk it." That is where I find myself, somewhere between knowing and walking.