I miss my childhood so so much, and when I say childhood, I mean when I was between the ages of 0.7years - 4years. Those were the years I could sit all day and watch tv without being disturbed or asked to go do chores. I still did chores though, when I was 6months, I got tired of sucking bress, it was too much of a chore, so I politely asked my mom for real food.
I was a cute baby who hardly cried, so whenever she brought her n*pple close I'll just look away and push it away from me. It was a risky thing to do with a Nigerian mom, because they always had the perfect tool to correct your senses. But surprisingly my mom didn't do that. She just smiled and kissed me on the forehead and went on to get me hot pap and cornflakes with bread, a little child's dreams, only that this one was also in my dreams, hahaha.
What I got instead in actual reality was a slap on the hands and as a little child I was made to experience pain for the first time and what followed was gruesome. Then, my face got forcefully turned towards the, yunno and I get choked on it amidst tears. Do you know the trauma I had to go through at such a tender age?, I'm sure you don't know.
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I guess I sorta grew up with that trauma, I got scared whenever i saw bress in front of me. My head goes back to the time when I was choked at a very tender age, the memories are still so fresh in my head. When I eventually started to grow up, from around the age of 6 years, I began to do chores like washing plates, a little bit of sweeping and so on, just the light stuff to prepare me for what awaits me.
Then, there was this day I was made to wash plate against my own wishes. I just got back from school and went straight to the Tv to watch my favorite cartoon show, when my mom came in almost immediately the first place she went to was the kitchen. Out of her numerous number of children (three to be exact), she chose me to go wash the plates.
I grudgingly headed to kitchen and began the most lovely task in the world. I was on my own o, doing the dishes with as much joy as I could have mustered when I heard my sisters giggling uncontrollably. You know that feeling when you're carrying a baby and then a stranger admires the baby so much and gets the little cutie candy. At that moment, you know it is finished, how the fuck do you want to get candy from a baby?
Even though it's unrelated, that's exactly how I felt. I was sad, but then the only thing between me and my favourite cartoon was this lucrative chore, I just had to finish it...and another sound, this time it was wild laughter, I couldn't take it anymore, I just needed to go take a peep, afterall my mom is in her room sleeping. So I quickly placed the plate with soap on it on the kitchen counter and raced to the living room.
I reached there in time to catch another funny scene before I heard a funny sound. How do you describe the sound a breakable plate makes when it hits the floor?, Well the only thing coming to my mind is gbagramgagammmmmm and with that I ran to the kitchen. But there my mom was, at the scene of the crime, stroking her detective glasses and already taking notes of the possible actions that led to this plate's death.
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After drawing her conclusion, I got the beating of my life, for it was one of her favorite breakables and if you knew how valuable they were then you'll know what I'd gotten myself into. Everything came at once, the speech slap (yunno, that one where she talks and slap you at the same time, if she repeats a word you get an extra slap, if she stresses on it you get a more painful slap), the iron knock (this one I hated the most, always left me knocked out), and for the first time I got my head hit on the wall, for several times, I was lucky it didn't break.
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This went on for minutes until I remembered something I watched off a movie, the louder you screamed the quicker you get set free. So I immediately applied that tactic and started to scream my lungs out and force salty tears out of my eyes. But unfortunately my Dad just stepped into the house and without even asking what transpired or carried out investigation, he descended on me and he used his master tactics, the two slaps at once tactics, no one told me to run out of the house.
I know most of y'all would be like, parents shouldn't treat their kids that way, human rights and whatever but I'll have to ask, would you take a rat to the river to swim? and still feed it fish?, exactly you wouldn't!, Hahaha. After such a beating, I tried my very best to avoid circumstances, but then, I don't know why I was always unluckily clumsy and I always paid the price.
At the age of 12 years, I started to become smarter. I watched a lot of mischievous movies and I wished how to get away with murder had aired then but sadly it didn't. I also had friends in school who'd been built to escape muddy situations and they did so with so much ease, so I sort of learnt a thing or two.
On one of those unlucky days, I got home quite early, a lot earlier than everyone else. I immediately went to the living room as usual, to see my favorite cartoon, I still loved cartoon so much. I turned on the switch and immediately saw a spark, a sharp light reflected from the switch that the tv was directly plugged to. I quickly switched it off, my heart beating faster, after a few moments, I put it on again. The tv refused to come on, at that moment I knew I was doomed.
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I immediately cleaned every trace of me, took my school bag and everything I came with and headed back to school. Only I didn't go back to school, I went to a friend's house which was our usual meeting point to play football. I played till I was satisfied and headed home sweating. When I got home, I met everyone silent and they just stared at me, I was scared, did they realize that I committed a crime?.
Trying not to act guilty I playfully asked what had happened. Apparently, after I left my mom was the next person to enter the house and as faith would have it, she went over to the living room and switched on the TV. According to her, the tv just wouldn't come on, maybe the light was low, but in the past 3hours it still wouldn't come on. Another likely theory is maybe dust had entered the tv because we didn't clean it regularly.
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I just laughed in my heart when I saw her hopeless condition. If i was the one, I would have been trialled immediately and convicted to death by hanging the way murderers do. Maybe I really did needed to see that series after all, ahahaha.
Thank you for reading this, if you enjoyed it or it connected to you in a way, I invite you to drop a comment I'll be glad to reply and Upvote for more content ❤️