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Greetings @carlor84 excellent, certainly many people find it hard to understand the problems, suffering or simply the things that other people are going through, this makes these people even more frustrated and unable to solve their problem, that is where true friends should be and support that person and look for that magic word that even when it does not exist we can locate it.
Good luck brother.
RE: How to win friends and influence people by Dale Carnegie: Honestly try to see things from the other person's point of view