Covert narcissist is just the worst. They make you think that they will change. So, you do not recognize that they are a narcissist, and they suck you dry.
I am sorry for your childhood, and am glad you at least know about your father.
The problem is, your mother was probably an enabler of some sort. And that leaves a lot of damage too.
I like Richard Grannon (on ThemTube) for info on healing from narcissist trauma.
I am glad that you are healing.
RE: She Doesn't Love You (Scapegoated Child of Cluster B mother)