Being a VERY honest person, i really have a hard time with gas-lighting.

So, i am doing something for somebody. "Do you want it done in method 'A' or method 'B'"?
So, the say "method 'A' of course"

and then you do that, and then they tell you that it should have been done by method 'B' and it is your fault for hearing wrong. Even when you checked, double checked, tripple checked, made samples...

Why would anyone tell you the wrong color, just so they can call you on it later?
Is their narcissistic supply more important than getting what they paid for/what they want?

(well, obviously i just answered my own question, but i would still prefer more discussion)

I have had one fragile narcissist tell me
F.N. "I need you to climb up into the attic and lift this thing"
Me "i cannot lift that thing in the attic"
F.N. "I know you can"

And the rest of the conversation was proving that i was wrong, and they knew better than me about my own strength (even though i helped put it into the attic and knew exactly how much it weighed)

Even knowing this, i couldn't extricate myself from the gas-lighting in the conversation.
And was hours thinking of what could i have said better...

The difference in overt and fragile narcissist, imo, is one is an extrovert and one is an introvert.
And if this is the total of the case, then they really can't change or devolve into the other.

But it really doesn't account for the fragile narcissist gaining lots of power and then acting like an overt narcissist (at least for a while)