In my entire career as a forensic psychiatrist, I never had an experience like this, this showed me the cruelty of man, for all the acts that murderer had committed that he had to evaluate that afternoon, as well as each of the events that took him to do such atrocities. From that day, I see the world with different eyes.
It all started with a call from Commissioner Edward Davis of the Riverside County Sheriff's Office, where I've been working for 5 years; that morning I was asked to do the psychiatric evaluation of an emergency of Adam Lancroft, the latest fashion serial killer who had been pursuing the police for a year and a half, who had finally been caught in an unexpected, surprising and ridiculously easy, taking into account everything this man did and how brilliant it was: it had been at 5:30 a.m. while drinking a coffee at Starbucks at 1280 W Blaine St A, where he was recognized by two young officers who entered the establishment, surprised at the see the subject, they immediately gave the voice of stop, pointing with guns to the subject and expecting the worst, ineffectually disguising the tremor that the situation caused them; Adam Lancroft, however, drank the last sip of coffee, looked at the officers and only said "Good morning, I will surely accompany you without problems".
Please Dr. Clifford, this is really urgent, this man should be prosecuted as soon as possible, in addition the media has gone mad, we have barely managed to keep them at bay -
I'm sorry Davis, I have commitments to fulfill today, it will have to be tomorrow. I do not see why this evaluation is so urgent, I can interview the subject at any point during its processing - I told Commissioner Davis
This is how it would be if it were a common case Doctor -
What do you mean? Is there any reason why this is a special case? The history of this country is riddled with serial killers like this, in some cases they receive more crimes than they actually committed - I said
Lancroft said he would not talk to anyone else until he talks to the psychiatrist, and he has asked you doctor, so until that evaluation is done, we can not move forward with the process - Replicated the commissioner.
That response from the commissioner surprised me a little, never before a subject had requested to speak first with the psychiatrist, in such case, they always asked for a lawyer as soon as they were detained, in fact the majority refused to interview with me, some even resorted to violence during the evaluation , so he was always accompanied by an officer at a distance while he was interviewing, but instead this man wanted to talk, not only with a psychiatrist, specifically with me, in fact he refused to continue with the process until he spoke with me; After reflecting for a few seconds I convinced myself that this must be that kind of subject that is desperate for attention.
Fine, I'll move my commitments for you and your peculiar guest, at what time should I go to the station? - Answer the commissioner.
Thank you, at 03:00 p.m., a patrol will pick you up from your office. - The comosionado answered before hang up.
Everything was as agreed; I could realize that this event really caused commotion, they made a security barricade one block from the station, in each of the 3 streets that gives access to it. Behind these barricades were dozens of people, all kinds of reporters, who issued any number of conjectures about the event, outraged protesters who asked for the execution of the detainee, even, incredible as it may seem, the acts the man who had committed this man had generated fanatics, followers who had also joined, acclaiming him and requesting his release immediately. You could really feel the euphoria and lack of control, some even tried to overcome the barricade by force when they gave us passage in the patrol.
Finally we arrived at the heavily guarded station, by police and agents of the S.W.AT team, I calculated that in total there were about 20 men in the place, the rest of the detainees had been evacuated. For the particular case and letting myself be carried away by curiosity, request total privacy to talk with the subject, there was a bit of resistance to my request at the beginning, in fact, I had to "negotiate" with one of the agents I have known for a while. time to make it happen, this assured me that even the surveillance system of the room would be turned off, later this would be reported as "a system failure". They gave me a thorough review, I was only allowed to enter with that notebook and a pen.
I was given the last instructions: 1 hour to do the interview, not a minute more, keep distance from him, not fraternize with him and if needed, ask for help, the door would be guarded by 2 agents.
I walked in the room and there he was, a man of medium height, black hair, abundant beard, green eyes; he seemed to care about his appearance, his physique denoted his Hispanic ancestry, as well as evident physical preparation and training; He wore mustard leather shoes, a blue jeans, and a white polo shirt. Both his hands and each of his legs were handcuffed to his chair, immediately I notice that on his left forearm he had a tattoo that seemed to be recent because of the intensity of the ink's color, it was a bird with outstretched wings that covered almost The whole region, in shades of red and orange tita "the phoenix," I presume. Upon entering immediately I look at my face and smile, as someone who has just received a visit from a friend at home one afternoon starts talking:
Dr. Adrien Clifford! It's an honor to meet you, I've read a lot about you, I'd stand up and shake your hand, but as you can see, I'm not "prevented" at this moment ... I'm glad you accepted my invitation. - He said while smiling
Mr. Lancroft - I said - since you already know me and you know why I am here, I will begin to ask you some questions, that way the process of ... -
Straight to the point! Excellent, I like that. Take a seat, do not worry, you've heard a lot about me and it's about to confirm each of the things I did, but I give you my word that it does not hurt you - he said as he interrupted me abruptly.
This man had a carefree attitude, arrogant, as if he were in total control of the situation, interrupted my speech; I must admit that in a way, it inspired some intimidation.
You are in a good mood, Mr. Lancroft, extremely confident, does that come from the pride he feels for what he has done? I must tell you that you are not in the best position to ... -
Of course, you think I'm not in the best position - he replied while smiling and stared at me - but we will not stop there, we'll take care of it. Since I know we have little time and I want you to listen to my story in detail (that's fundamental for what comes next), there will be no need for me to ask the classic questions in these interviews, I know what all this is about, so relax and listen in detail to everything I am going to tell you, if there is something you want to point or interrupt to clarify, feel free to do so. -
The cynicism of this man did not cease to amaze me, this guy was dominating the interview, maybe I acted as a reflex or I had to see my perplexity, but I did not oppose in any way, I just reclined and started taking notes. Without waiting another second Lancroft began his story:
My mother hated me, everything I did seemed wrong, for her I was just a scum, she always told me that I should not exist, that I was the one responsible for her misfortune. In school the story was not very different, I was always the weak, the needy, the foreign child without a father, they made fun of me, they beat me, they did any number of things, I remember that once I had to go home without shoes and without clothes, beaten and full of garbage, they had put me inside a dumpster, then they wrote me with oil paint on my back "hybrid garbage" that's what they called me, when I got home my mother beat me up and I was sent to sleep without eating, I said that I deserved nothing, if I was not able to defend myself. None of the school authorities did anything, he was always alone.
All this worsened when I got to high school, teasing, bad treatment, humiliation. However, I eventually made a group of "friends" and I fell in love, I fell madly in love with this girl: Zoe Turner, she was perfect, beautiful, intelligent, kind. All this made me think that there was hope for me, that until that moment my life had been terrible, but that there was a better tomorrow, I just had to be a good boy, earn people, live to serve and eventually good things would come for me, my life would be happy. -
Suddenly he interrupted himself to make a mocking laugh, while affirming that he had been a complete idiot at that moment. To which I replied: - I was giving a different approach to his life, I was just beginning to know the world and its people, some are good and others bad, you just have to distinguish between them, maybe if you had not lost that focus ... -
I see you pay close attention, that's good. However, you're wrong, you'll see what I mean - He said before continuing his story while staring at me
Liam Walker, my best friend, my confidant, I trusted him completely, I always asked him for advice of all kinds, I always wanted to be close to him, he always joked and told me he was teaching to live. I told him everything about Zoe, what he made me feel, the plans I made when we were together, I asked him for advice on love and since I was shy, I asked him to help me, to talk to her, you know, to "prepare the ground for me", which I accept. The day arrived, I planned everything to declare myself in an annual school event, I learned to play the guitar, I memorized her favorite song, I wanted everything to be perfect. And I did. Guess the result? Well the only thing I got was the rejection in the worst possible way, in front of everyone, she told me that she would never notice someone like me, besides, there was already someone in her life. Days later I could realize that this someone else was nothing less than my best friend, who had prepared the ground, but for himself. -
I insist Mr. Lancroft, I was just a boy, I handle the situation in an wrong way - I replied
As I said doc, we have little time, please let me continue, maybe this seems absurd, but in any case none of the 2 can return the time to avoid everything that happened, right? - He said this while leaning towards me. After a brief pause, I continue:
I confronted him, confronted my friend and told him how he could do that to me, he just told me laughing "Sorry buddy, these things happen", we ended up fighting, I lose, the rest of our friends took their part, they ignored me and erased me from their lives as if nothing, they even let me out of a project that you were working on together, it was the heyday of smartphone apps and we wanted to innovate, it's worth noting that they got a good amount of money when they sold that project. To make matters worse, I was expelled from school for inappropriate behavior, while Liam did not suffer any consequences. Of course, he always denied that the fact that being the deputy director's son had something to do with the lack of punishment towards him.
I was hurt, depressed, desperate, I did not know how to continue living, tormented, I felt like trash, I did not want to eat, I could not sleep ... I finally decided to take the same path as my father, to end my life and if I ended my suffering, In any way the world would be better without me, as my mother always said. I hung myself in my room. I remember the feeling of death, of suffocation, of fighting, of wanting to die and of being saved at the same time, slowly everything calmed down, I felt dizzy and very sleepy. Maybe it was a allucination for lack of oxygen, but the next thing I remember is the dark void and a voice saying "You're already dead, the people around you have killed you, but you must return, you must do justice, you must take control, you must make them pay "Then I woke up in a hospital, apparently I had been rescued at the last moment and" I was very lucky "according to the doctors.
After all (and of a long months in therapy with a therapist who gave a shit about my life and only fulfilled a pretense by pretending to listen to me) I had no choice but to continue with my life, always with the strange memory of those words when I died, but without fully understanding them. Of course, at this point there was not a single person speaking to me, my mother had finally left. However, I was able to survive because apparently the Lancroft family felt ashamed because a boy who had his last name was alone, without money and had tried to end his life. -
At that moment, he paused briefly, which he took advantage of to ask: - About that Mr. Lancroft: Did you ever have contact with any of your relatives? -
I decided to take an economics degree and see what happened, I already had the right contacts from the Lancroft family. Although it acted by inertia, it was a new beginning, this time I decided to isolate myself, did not open anyone so they could not hurt me, the campus offered the loneliness I wanted. Unfortunately it did not take long for someone to damage my peace, Ryan Handal, my roommate, was a real jerk, he thought he was the best in the world, he was just there as a parasite, he had only gotten so far thanks to his parents' money. I had enough, it made noise, it left me out of the room, it did not let me study, the whole room was always a damn disaster. Any attempt to talk to him was a failure, he said he had to put up with me and if I did not like him, I just left. -
At this point I could only think "what a bad luck this man had, he could not even find someone in his life to help him see things, to show him other ways and prevent him from becoming a ruthless killer driven by madness. Suddenly he interrupts my thoughts when he says:
One night, Ryan left me out of the room, all night, the reason: I was with 2 girls doing a threeway; I had to study for an important exam that I had the next day, and all my notes were there, I begged him to let me in, at least to look for my things and leave, but I completely ignored me, I had to spend the night on campus and I also lost that exam, I almost lost the semester because of it. I do not know how to describe exactly what happened in me, I only know that something snap, I was determined to act, but it was strange because I did not lose my temper, it was as if something was guiding me, as if I could see myself from the outside.
I knew that the next night they would give a party in the house of one of the fraternities, a party that Ryan would not miss, so I followed him, I waited patiently, maybe 5 or 6 hours for him to leave, once I saw him leave, just holding on to his feet, without saying anything I took it, I dragged it behind some bushes and began to hit him, hit him with all my strength, no matter where the blows fell, I do not know how I managed to dominate him, he was a bigger guy than me, maybe I could not defend himself because I was drunk or the adrenaline in me allowed me to do all that, but I totally submitted it and hit it until my hands bled, it felt so good, I saw reflected in everything bad that had happened to me, all the people who had hurt me, at that moment I understood those words "take control, do justice, make them pay", it was the biggest revelation of my life, nothing else mattered. I had to finish with this, so I put it on his back on the floor, I looked at his disfigured and bleeding face and I said "you screwed me, and thanks to you I lost something important for me, but not anymore, I'm going to end it, I'm going to put an end to your existence here and now "I took him by the neck and began to squeeze, to strangle him, slowly and with all my strength, I saw how he writhed with the few strength that was left to try to get away , I listened as he tried to beg for his life, to ask for help, to even distinguish a babble in which he begged me for forgiveness and promised to leave me alone, he asked me not to kill him, he said he was afraid of dying. I just kept squeezing and laughing, the last thing I heard about him is "you're fucking crazy"; I saw the despair in his eyes, little by little I took his life until finally I stopped breathing in my hands. I had done it, I had settled the account, I had won, I killed it, it would not bother me anymore. I really enjoyed it, I enjoyed it like nothing ever in my life, the feeling of power was impressive; At that moment I understood my true purpose, I felt happy, at peace with myself, I felt fulfilled. -
I've been doing this for many years, but I've never seen so much joy in someone as he recounted how he took the life of another man, this was unmatched, incredible, disgusting, his face denoting sincere happiness, euphoria and joy. I felt disgusted, confused, I remember that I only got to say:
So you're telling me, when you killed that man, did you feel it was the best moment of your life? - I said, almost babbling
Something like that, doctor, is not as simple as just killing people- He answered proudly, as he continued: - I understood that I had to free myself, that it was my time to do justice, I had to settle accounts with those who had destroyed me, they had killed me, I understood I had to be reborn, and the only way was to kill each and every one of the people who had hurt me.
Ryan's murder had certainly been careless, reckless, they could have discovered me. But use my brain, take all the necessary precautions, plant a couple of things to make believe that Ryan had made a drug dealer angry, when they interrogated me, only commented on aspects of his personality that were true and suited the situation, plus , alleges that I was left out of the university that night due to the illness of a relative, a story that could be confirmed thanks to a small favor owed to me, in the same way I faked an accident to justify the injuries on my hands ... in short, what I had achieved, the incident was famous, but none of that was linked to me at that time.
In a way, I feel gratitude towards Ryan, change in my life, now more than ever I had goals, something to fulfill, I felt strong, determined, everything began to improve in my life. I had the confidence to continue my career, with excellent qualifications, I must say, I learned to manipulate people, I developed the talent to make him believe that he was a friendly man, the good guy they could trust, I even learned to tell the women what they wanted to hear and show them what they wanted to see to get what I wanted, leave all feeling aside.
I started to prepare a plan, I remember that the first thing I did was make use of my good memory, I took a notebook and wrote the name of each one of the people who had hurt me, so I got a list of 287 people, 287 targets to which I had to eliminate. -
So, is it true? - I said approaching him, in an attempt perhaps to make him see the magnitude of what he was saying - You were involved in the death of 286 people? That means that only one person...
That's right, - he said as he leaned back in his chair, feeling like a champion - they all had to do with me (well, I must admit there was collateral damage along the way, and if you count Ryan ... that makes a slightly bigger number ), all were different deaths, because all had contributed differently to my death, I must admit, some more spectacular and elaborate than others.
I also started my physical and mental preparation, I knew that I would need it, I made an effort and I was the best in my class, I graduated with honors and I got the best job I could have, one that allowed me to expand my financial resources, allowed me to have thousands of I would need contacts, swear to use each and every one of the resources at my disposal to achieve my goal. I understood that before killing them "physically", I had to destroy the lives of these people, slowly, unsuspectedly, so I would enjoy it more, they would die mentally and spiritually (which is more painful, in my opinion) before they cease to exist, I could do that easily, I knew their fears and their weaknesses. No one was going to make the connection between these people, some belonged to the same class or group, but they were distributed throughout the country, they had dedicated themselves to totally different jobs, the only link was to have met me.
So plan the death for each one, the objective in which I have been working in the last 7 years, I ...
That is atrocious, unimaginable, who could do something like that? - I suddenly replied as I got up from my chair - Did not you think that the best way to act was to heal without hurting others? Did not you think about how this would destroy your own life in different ways? He became one of the most ruthless assassin in history, all those dead people ... for reasons like the one you expose ... just look at yourself! Now he is here locked up, and for all this, he will face the death penalty! -
Calm down doc, do not get ahead, let me continue. As I was saying, I started acting once I had everything perfectly planned, made to walk the machinery, despite using other people to reach my goal, I swore to myself that the final blow would always come from me. It was really wonderful, I'll tell you some of my favorites:
Start at the house Walker - Turner family. Yes, my dear friend and her lovely Zoe had married and formed a beautiful family after finishing high school, had gone to live in Charleston. After plunging them into failure and a lot of debt, I faked a break-in, a domestic robbery, where unfortunately the family was brutally murdered ... hahahahaha that was epic, leave the child for the end and go, as his parents suffered, and as I cry little Liam Jr. before dying.
Between one target and another, I was eliminating my old group of friends from high school: Joyci Parker, the famous New York entrepreneur, destroy by the death of her husband in a car accident, died of poisoning due to the combination of Barbiturates and alcohol (this was a special, I admit that I felt some pity for her, since she was the only one who at first disagreed with leaving me out, but in the end, she gave in to others, which made her guilty.
Roger Murphy, who was already facing various demands for sanitary incidents in his restaurants in Kansas, the press presumed that led by the desperation started the fire where he died (this guy was really afraid of dying in a fire, always said he felt desperate just imagine the heat, the feeling of suffocating and dying slowly in the fire)
Robert Cooper, murdered in prison, after being convicted of the death of one of his patients, medical malpractice was the verdict. The subject was devastated, had disappointed each and every one of the people who had him as a god, his negligence had killed someone else, just what he had sworn never to do. I had no idea how this could have happened, of course, I did my magic to make this possible. It was very difficult for me to infiltrate that prison to kill him.
James Wood, the computer tycoon, who was divorcing for having discovered his husband cheating on someone else in his own bed, died tragically in the wreck of his yacht. I need a lot of help to sink that damned yacht and make sure everyone on board drowns.
That's how I ended up with each and every one of my high school friends; other deaths that were very significant to me were the deaths of Ross Patel, the idiot who tortured me as a child, the poor devil who never left Mason, his only achievement was getting a job in the garbage dump, he died crushed by tons of garbage, which was very convenient, because it was this guy who put me in that garbage container. Another good example is that of Kyra Foster, the little shit who made sure that everyone in the school hated and mistreated me, ended up being a prostitute mother of 5 children, died "at the hands of a client, who gave him 19 stab wounds" according to the press. I will never forget the expression on his face as he stabbed her.
Everything went as it should, there was certainly some other person who helped me and felt remorse, I had to eliminate those later, but they were minor details. And as I predicted, no one could even suspect that many of the deaths were murders, others were too clear, as in the case of Ernesto Vázquez, it was too obvious that it was a homicide when he launched from the balcony of his apartment , mea culpa. But there were no clues pointing to the same person as the author of these deaths, until a year and a half ago, when in this same police station that file appeared that had details of each of the deaths and linked me to myself as an author, later that information mysteriously leaked in each of the existing media, and here we are.
Yes, apparently all your plans, Mr. Lancroft, were not as perfect as you thought, as I said, you were captured and you will face the death penalty for the unjustified horrors that you have committed, you are a psychopath who failed in his committed to get away with it after all - I said a few meters from him, still standing.
Look, Dr Clifford, that's where he's wrong - he said while, to my surprise, he got up from his chair and took off his wife without much effort - All this is planned, do not you think he was going to let me capture so easily ? Not when, despite you and the whole world thinking I'm crazy, that my actions are not right, I know I'm doing the right thing, I'm cleaning the world of hypocrites, selfish and traitors.
Obviously, when I saw this, I quickly retreated, but as he spoke he approached me, I feared for my life, I petrified, but in spite of this I reacted and started screaming for help, but as I ran towards the door, I could hear sudden movements, blows Shouts and shots from the other side of the door in the room.
I tried to open the door, but Lancroft held me tightly by the hand and stopped me - I would not do that if it were you, right now my people are doing a butcher shop out there, and I need you to survive, in here it's safe with me, this was planned, every minute, every second. I have closely followed your work, I know everything about you, so I chose it, I want you to tell this whole story in detail, you will be the only survivor in this police precinct, as I told you, it does not hurt you, I am a man of word -.
I was surprised, I walked towards a corner, I sat on the floor to take refuge and I only managed to ask: - Did you prevent everything that ...? -
Everything had calmed down outside, apparently it was over, eventually agents opened the door, handed him a brown leather jacket, a couple of his belongings, a gun and my own belongings.
I was still in the corner of the room, perplexed, I only saw from afar through the door the horrible massacre that had taken place outside that room, you could see the savagery and hatred that moved these people.
This is a monstrosity Adam - I said almost crying, -will lead many to madness, fill them with hate, this is not justice, this is revenge -
I will teach you to use that hatred doctor, I will show you the way of the truth, to submit the world and to do justice (or to avenge yourself as you say) -
He left my things next to me, took a device from the pocket of his jacket and put it on the floor
Finally he left, while I tried to process everything that had just happened. Today, after 3 months, I can not overcome that.
Image taken from: https://imgur.com/gallery/r6ZxJ3C
