Normal nodes have no need to store the 28GB "shared_memory" file in memory now. All our nodes store it on SSD storage (which is actually advantageous in some ways since the storage is persistent that way). In practice, a typical node uses around 4GB of resident memory nowadays.
RE: 5th update of 2024: Lite “hived” nodes, 2nd layer plans, and lots more (accidental repost, don't vote)