NEW PRODUCT: The “Procrastin-A-Tray™” Is Finally Here (We Just Took a While to Tell You)
Tired of putting things off but also kinda okay with it?
Introducing the Procrastin-A-Tray™ — the world’s first device built specifically to help you feel more comfortable doing absolutely nothing while pretending you might start something soon.
What’s Included:
A tilt-adjustable tray for your laptop, notebook, or unopened mail
Built-in snack compartment for “creative fuel”
An optional guilt-dampening sound machine (plays motivational YouTube intros but never the full video)
One button that says “I’ll do it tomorrow” (and means it)
Bonus Features:
Cupholder also holds excuses
Storage for old to-do lists you’ll never look at again
Magnetic pen loop (pen not included, obviously)
This isn’t productivity.
This is pre-productivity.
The sweet spot between ambition and Netflix.
The Procrastin-A-Tray™ is perfect for:
Writers
Students
Overthinkers
That one cousin who “has a lot of ideas”
It comes fully assembled.
Because let’s be real… you weren’t gonna build it.
