Man this is such a loaded issue for me. I tend to agree with a lot of what you'res saying but it def doesn't always work out that way.

I was in a marriage that lasted 2 years, and the man I was married to flipped his proverbial shit once we had a child. I am now realizing he was likely on the spectrum, he was great at technology, computers etc, not so great with people. It was his idea to get married however. We had a fairly short courtship, a year and a half before getting married at that point.

He was the first guy I had met that didn't seem just interested in me for my looks/sex, so that was a really attractive quality. Though, that got old once into the marriage. Ya definitely want a guy to be sexually into you once you're married.

Anywho. I wasn't perfect. I totally get that. I relied a lot on my parent's help during the first few months of raising our daughter. (He didn't do much around the house man-wise like yards, basic maintenance, and I was never sleeping because I was up with the baby ALL NIGHT). So my dad would come over and mow etc, and it used to piss him off because that was "his" job (even though he didn't do it, whatevs.)

I also started to do some of the things I enjoyed once I was able to get small breaks from our daughter. I came home one night from a once-a-week choir practice to a brand new guitar with a note on it that said "I want a divorce. I can't play house anymore".

Needless to say, he made a LOT of money working in cloud computing once we divorced, and has been a shit dad who has never kept up with the menial child support he agreed to pay in the first place, methinks out of guilt more than anything.

He remarried a year or so ago to this psycho Thai girl who tried to stab him and their unborn child because he threatened to leave her. (The police report I obtained was quite colorful). He always had this Anime/Asian girl thing.

The point being, I have been embroiled in a legal battle with him because he started demanding more time with our daughter after 7 years of being an intermittent Disneyland dad, only seeing her whenever the hell he wanted. He is also in contempt of court for owing over 8k in past child support. (He made 100k a year btw)

Recently he said he would give up fill visitation rights to our daughter if I made his arrears and current child support go away. He is literally giving up his own daughter to save $300 a month. Father of the year.

I'm not always a great wife, I know I am difficult. I don't really demand much. I can live on nothing, really, but I need someone to be there emotionally, and he wasn't. That was hard, and was something I didn't react well to. That is likely why he wanted a divorce.

I certainly didn't celebrate. He had asked me to quit my job so I could stay home and care for our child, so when he left I was 3 years out of work, and completely lost. I started my own company from home so I could still take care of my then (not even 1 year old).

Shortly after I met my current husband, though he is def not an alpha and I was still very young when my ex divorced me. Only 24.

I agree that the older you get the far harder it is to find someone after divorce, and that alpha males are not going to care for a child that isn't theirs, typically. An alpha male relationship is usually defined by resources, and they are not going to give those resources to a child who isn't theirs. I probably could have married an alpha given that I was still young, beautiful and fertile, but things just happen the way they do. My current husband and I have been together almost 8 years.

I think it's pretty terrible for women to be celebrating divorce. It is still a dark spot on my life, even 8 years later.

Anyway, didn't want to drop my whole life story, just thought I would add some perspective!