Hello fellow Hive users, how are you all?
This story is about my problem, and the pictures that are different are not mine.
Yes, I admit it. I become really toxic when I get extremely angry. I get so bad-tempered that I don't care about what comes out of my mouth or how it makes you feel. I don't know, but I'm really not good at handling my emotions, especially when I'm mad. That's why I try to avoid getting angry and I try to convince myself that "it's okay" because when I get angry, I sometimes don't even recognize myself. So, as long as I can understand and empathize with the person, I do it. I also don't want to lose anyone and be left behind just because of the bad attitude I have when I'm angry.
Sometimes I lose control when I'm angry. I don't know if what I'm saying is right or if I'm hurting someone else. All I want is to be heard, not to be met with more anger. It's incredibly difficult, especially when you're holding back all these heavy problems. Sometimes I just start crying for no reason, maybe because of the extreme anger or the pain I'm carrying inside. This is what I get. Why is it like this? Why don't they understand me? Why? I really want to release all the pain in my heart, but how? How can I release it if there's no one who wants to listen to what I have to say? Sometimes I want to give up, but then I think about my child. What will happen to my child if I'm gone? Who will take care of my child? Lord, I leave it all to you. Please guide me.