As 2017 drew to a close, so did a profound chapter in the life of my family, with the passing of my Mum on 27 December 2017 at age 84, with complications from advanced dementia.
Because as a society in Australia, we have less compassion for human suffering than we do for animal suffering, it took 3 long days for her to pass, while either I, my father (her husband of 63 years and partner of 70 years) or one of her 3 grandchildren sat with her, calmed her and held her hand.
Of course we kept her as comfortable as possible until she finally succumbed while alone with Dad holding her hand and stroking her hair. As it should have been.
Thinking back on Mum's early life I recall her telling me that as a young school girl she was evacuated from Sydney to Katoomba during WWII, after Japanese mini subs entered Sydney harbour.
My Mum Yvonne (2 yrs) with her parents Amelia and Victor Billington circa 1935, Sydney, Australia
After the war, she graduated Hornsby Girls High School and was granted a place at the Sydney Conservatorium of Music. However, her family were against further study and thought she should have a trade so she could earn a living, so she became a tailoress.
Post war there was high demand for hand beaded evening gowns for Sydney socialites and theatre costumes, so Mum's trade was in high demand. Ultimately she specialised in hand beading evening dresses, evening bags and even evening shoes.
Around 1947 my Dad who had left home in the ‘bush’ and moved to the ‘big smoke’ (aka Sydney), rented a room in Mum’s home from her parents and that was how they met. They started attending local dances together and after 7 years of dating, including a long engagement, once Mum turned 21 she was permitted to marry my dad.
On reflecting on her married life it occurs to me that Mum was a working mother long before it became ‘a thing’. In the early 1960s she would drop me off the Wharoonga Preparatory School for Young Ladies before heading off to work with Dad, they had adjoining businesses.
Then when they purchased hospitality properties she worked full-time in that industry. While we always lived on site at those properties Mum always worked long hours.
Much, much later when I had grown up, married, separated and decided to head off to university despite having three young children of my own (long before you could do uni online), it was Mum’s keeping the house clean, doing the laundry, the shopping and cooking dinner every night that made it possible for me to get my degrees and have a new career.
As our whole family gathered this week (all 20 of us) to have a gathering to celebrate the Christmas we missed and Mum’s life, it was not lost on me that had she not had 1 child, and I had not had 3 children there would not be 12 grandchildren.
So in the years to come when those 12 grandchildren grow and have families of their own, my working Mum who never went to uni, has started quite a legacy.
In loving memory... Yvonne Kleinig 1933 - 2017
