I tend to find that those who haunt me mostly are the ones who gave to me (even if just emotional support) and in some way I failed them...according to my own standards. Those I could hold interesting conversations with...it has been so long that I think I have forgotten what it is like.

The problem is made worse for me by my staying in South Africa. Most people here try to be pragmatic (culture has something to do with yoghourt, hasn't it?) or their concerns are to do with having a weekly barbeque (braai), watching rugby or cricket. That seems to be it.