I have a problem in seeing how empathy can make us bitter - after all, if I place myself in your shoes, it means I understand and feel how you do. However (I'm trying to work my way to what you said), what if I open myself to empathy, feel and understand and forgive you - and then realise I've been had. Would I blame you or would I blame myself for being credulous and for allowing empathy to make a fool of me?

I guess I would need to have empathy for myself - which is not what is encouraged in the new culture of this age. We are only supposed to feel empathy with the needs of others, not our own.