Hey you! Recently, for my Mandarin, I have spent plenty of time watching Chinese dramas. Wow, they are really good, incredibly funny and super entertaining. The more I watch the more I understand Chinese culture. And I love it.
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Usually, I choose to watch love dramas for several reasons: simple scripts, useful lines that I can pick up and damn good looking actors and actresses. Mostly, I am satisfied with those stories, cutie couples, romantic loves. There, also, is where I see the danger.
Have you ever heard of the myth that if you keep telling yourself or keep believing in what others say you are, you then will be? That is the strength of thoughts and the weakness of mind. It happens without your consciousness so watch out for what you are listening.
But what is the relation between Chinese dramas and the power of thoughts? Well, I hope that I have not taken you too far and you are getting tired and lost. I will go straight to the point right now. Like I said, in most of Chinese dramas I have seen, love stories are romantic but...come on! Do girls need to be that clumsy and dumbie to be loved? How many times have you seen a strong, smart, rich, elegant whatsoever man and an innocent, pure, kind woman make a most desirable love ever on screen? It's sweet, isn't it? No, it's not. At all.
Of course I know that you have choice to become or not to become something. That they are just on TVs, not in real life. But remember about the power of thoughts? It's true. I have seen a lot of women, smart women, try to hold herself to not be smarter than her...husband. A lot of independent girls have to pretend to be weak so that her man has space to show off his power. Most women grown up being told the happiest thing to a lady is becoming a mother and well taking care of her family. Don't get me wrong, I still value family connection but not in the way that mom runs around and dad goes out for work. Alas, dramas are driving us into that silly, typical way.
Ladies! It's sad if you know you are a diamond but have to dim your light so can fit in a bag of charcoals. And it's a trauma if you finally forget who you are.
So, what is the 3 most dangerous words in Chinese dramas? They are "我养你". Cannot find an expression to translate exactly these words to English. Basically, it means "I will provide you foods and every thing you need for you to live your life".
Children? Pets? Prisoners? Whom is the "I" in this sentence talking to? Well, They are saying it to their partner-a free, grown up, well-being human. Or maybe not so free.
The saying itself is not dangerous but the deadly point is girls are happy to hear it, believing in it and some even wishing for it. How many girls watch the scene a man say to his girlfriend 我养你 and "awwwe"? Or how much do the producers of those dramas think ladies will like that scene? Dear Mr.Producer, we are women, we are far more than that.
Honestly, I don't care much about feminism or fighting for equal rights between genders. All I want to support is the happiness of independence, men or women, we all should stand and walk on own feet. Be free to show the best and the the worst of you. Where you can fulfill yourself, go for it.
And to my dear ladies, I always admire how lovely, strong, kind and tough in the way you are. Let we smile and leave those 我养你 just for the TV shows.
