Healing is not about forgetting

Grief is not a tunnel from which you emerge unscarred; it is a storm that tears you apart and a fire that consumes everything you were before the loss.

This process is messy and does not follow a pattern; it is a maze where there are days when you move forward and days when you can barely move.

You were taught to be strong, but no one told you that being strong also means breaking.

Healing is not about forgetting, overcoming or ignoring the pain. Healing is allowing the pain to pass through you without fear of falling apart.

It is picking up the fragments of who you were and finding beauty in them. It is to cry until the tears are no longer an enemy and become a warm embrace.

Don't demand to be well when everything in you screams otherwise. There are no rewards for appearing strong, no punishments for feeling too much. If you can only breathe today, breathe. If you can only cry, cry.

Each tear represents love that still seeks a place to rest. The loss hurts because the love was real and still lives on in your skin and in your memory.

Be patient with yourself; the wound closes with respect and, in time, the pain will soften, not because you have stopped loving, but because you will learn to live with the love that remains.